Alcohol thoughts

I am not providing alcohol. We could have paid $100.00 less for the venue if we said we would have it but instead we are telling people we aren't providing it but I know some folks will bring it and for those that do I told them they can't share it it would be for personal consumption. Most won't be bringing it and everyone will have a good time. Not being able to have fun without alcohol is not a problem we are seeking to solve. As for folks leaving early I can't see that happening either. For people who want to come to your wedding especially your family they aren't going to ditch because you don't have alcohol and for those that would it seems they care more about drinking then about you and the wedding so don't worry about them leaving early.

Do what you are most comfortable with. We are definitely going dry. We don't don't drink, my friends and family know it they will be fine.

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This is a good point. We are religious as well and feel we can have a good time without it.

I would do wine as a compromise. I tend to think most people would enjoy and have fun with or without alcohol. Do not stress yourself out because this is your day and you are going to have a wonderful wedding whether you are going to have alcohol or not.

If you think your guests will enjoy having wine then it seems like a fair compromise unless it goes against your personal beliefs about alcohol.

Hey! I am a Christian and I know that i have some family that won't approve...but my FH and I drink and so I had this dilemma as well. I don't think that weddings w/o alcohol are boring...I hope no one participates in weddings in that way. Alcohol doesn't equal fun. However, I personally think it's fun when everyone has a little access to alcohol at the wedding. Sometimes weddings (even for the guests) can be a little stressful with a lot going on, feeling out of place, not knowing many people, etc. And a little wine or beer could take the edge off! Making it a little more comfortable for everyone so they can stay around a little more. So I'm not doing a full bar, I literally just bought bulk (124 bottles or something) in a variety pack of Blue Moon Beer (an easy drinking, people-pleasing beer) from Costco and I'm going to buy 30 bottles of $3 wine from Trader Joes (it's not too bad). That's for about 175 guests, only half of which may drink some. I plan on having lots leftover since I know this crowd pretty well.

If you get beer, don't get a keg! You can't save the leftovers and a ton is wasted. Go for bottles or cans. We're gonna throw some in the getaway car and have it for the honeymoon!

You do not need to have alcohol at your wedding. Do what you want. . . . Anyone who cannot loosen up enough to dance, or talk with family and friends,( reasons for alcohol cited often on wedding wire) without alcohol have a problem with their social skills. You are not required to provide alcohol as a remedy. These same people should be getting through workdays and evenings, all time with children, time spent driving anywhere, and most activities without alcohol. If they drink so much they are dependent on it, it is not your problem . We each drink, but have been to a lot of alcohol free weddings. But Everytime we go to a state park, national park or forest, local park, school or town activity, the events are alcohol free by lae. So what. People still have a great time. There are 4 venue's near us that do most of the weddings, and big company or personal events, in this area. The two with no alcohol or smoking allowed anywhere on their grounds do as much business as those where alcohol may be served. The places are popular. People go to one event, then later schedule sometime for their next occasion. Most people do not walk out, any more than they walk out of work, church, or children's activities including sports, for lack of something like no alcohol. Those who would put their need for alcohol ahead of friendship or family? Let them walk. Getting upset over no alcohol is like walking out of a wedding because you are serving cheesecake, pie, and baklava, but have no cake. There are plenty of times in life when cake is not available. If that is enough to disturb someone, the problem that person has is beyond what your wedding can fix, so do not try. What you want, and the religious traditions of your family, outweigh specific wants of guests, as long as you are providing other enjoyable things. This is true of dinner parties in your home as well as weddings . People can do what they want when the are hosts, and accept or decline anything when they are guests . And hosts should not feel they need to cater to everything a guest might possibly want.

View Quoted Comment I just wanted to say thank you Judith. So many of us get harsh words for not having alcohol at weddings on here it's really upsetting. I think it's important to be inclusive to families or situations that don't involve alcohol

I understand your dilemma, I'm not serving alcohol at my wedding, but there is a bar in the reception location, so guests may go and help themselves, but my fiancé and I do not want to condone drinking/drunkenness. I don't think it is fair of people to presume you will serve alcohol and if someone cannot have a good time without alcohol that is on their heads not yours.

I am doing wine and beer for our wedding, no liquor as it is pricey, but we may do 1 or 2 signature cocktails just for cocktail hour.

Ive been to dry weddings and it is really not a big deal. People that complain of going to weddings without alcohol are a bit inconsiderate imo, it’s like is it to celebrate the couple or to drink... come on.

That sounds perfect to me. We had a lunch reception and served wine only as well. We wanted to do wine and beer but our venue was giving us a hard time about it (they were saying they “couldn’t keep track” of how much we were spending since it was a consumption bar and it would be too complicated to keep track 🙄???) so we just agreed to do wine only so all the drinks would be the same price and they could just make tallies to keep track. But honestly it was nice. Having beer would’ve been good too but no one seemed to care THAT much that it was missing 🤷🏻‍♀️ I also feel like people are more likely to drink beer in excess rather than wine. I mean, of course “wine drunk” is still a thing but people are definitely less inclined to chug wine than to chug beer lol.

I think you’ll be fine seriously. Everyone on this site made me rethink this decision a thousand times but ultimately it was what we had to do due to the difficulty our venue was giving us, but... it really all just worked out perfectly so you shouldn’t overthink it. As long as you provide some sort of alcohol people will be grateful for it and be grateful to be invited.

View Quoted Comment 3$!!!!! 😱 I was Looking all over the place last night for decent prices. This is amazing!

View Quoted Comment Thank you so much for your kind thoughts!!

We will be having beer, wine and 2 signature drinks for the first 2 hours of the reception and that is it. The remaining time will be punch, soda, tea and water. We have to be out of our venue by 9 pm and that includes clean up so we didn't want anyone going overboard with the alcohol and not being able to sober up in time to go home. We have quiet a few guests that do not know how to limit themselves with the drinking so we will have to do it for them.

View Quoted Comment No smoking or alcohol in parks is not necessarily correct. Some parks have designated smoking areas depending on state, county, or city. You may also apply for an alcohol permit depending on county or city or park.
Secondly walking out because cake isn't served but instead it's cheesecake is not a comparison to a dry wedding. At least with cheesecake there is an OPTION of dessert. Sure people can live without dessert or alcohol but it doesn't mean they wouldn't like it. Just because the married couple don't eat dessert doesn't mean other people shouldn't have it.

Have it, don't have it. Yes people post their opinions about drinking at the reception. Whether they are pro or con both can be equally passionate about their position.

View Quoted Comment Gee, I assumed that the OP would be offering a choice of beverages, just not alcoholic ones. Not , no beverages at all. Which is why I compared it to being offered a dessert that just wasn't cake. . . . And the most basic etiquette of entertaining is that the hosts, not the guests, choose what is offered for food and beverages. And guests say yes please, or no, thank you. Never, ever suggesting to the hosts that something else or additional be served. It goes hand in hand with other etiquette basics, like the person who gives a gift chooses what it is, not the person receiving it. Hosts decide what to provide.

My FH and I don't really drink, so it feels nuts to spend over $1000 for other people. I also have a lot of alcoholics in my family. However, I think it'll be more fun for our guests and maybe even for us with some alcohol. We're providing wine and beer and non-alcoholic options as well. We want lots of dancing, and I think alcohol helps with that

I think just wine is perfectly fine.