Advise on Dad's new Gf- Mum passed away

I'm sorry about your loss. I can't imagine how difficult that would be, especially during wedding planning. That being said, unless you are truly maxed out on your guest list, I think that your father should be able to bring his significant other (and anyone else in a relationship, but that's a different post.) By your wedding, they will have been together for 7-8 months. It's not our place to determine how serious their relationship is, but it's not like they'll be brand new. You didn't mention him saying that he expected her to be in family photos, so I'm not sure why that is a concern.

A couple is a social unit, whether they've been dating for a month at the time invites go out or 10 years. Couples should always be invited together. Also, if people are traveling a far distance (and I'm assuming your dad is traveling half way across the world for your wedding), then it is also usually polite to allow them to bring a companion. I don't know how close you are with your dad, but I would also think, even despite these etiquette rules, immediate family usually has more "perks." Also, the girlfriend does not have to be in any posed photographs if you don't want her to be.

I’m really sorry this happened and I know it must be difficult. But I do think she should be invited.

I'm so sorry for your loss.
Unfortunately, I think you need to extend the invitation to the girlfriend. It is entirely up to you whether she is included in photos.

You still have some time before your wedding so who knows if the new GF will be around by then. But you do need to invite her. Consider it may also be really hard for your dad, being at your wedding without your mom... his GF may be the companion he needs for his emotional support.

This is so difficult as a bride. I think she should be invited but as you said, left out of official pictures. I assume you’re having a head table with the bridal party or a sweetheart table. She should be allowed to sit at the family table with your father, as that’s not really seen if you’re not at it. The attention won’t be focused on them.

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Thanks for all your comments:

Our guest list is really tight. Like REALLY. only family and bridal party. All our friends are evening only, we are hoping that if some family members drop out we can bring them into our all-day list, this is why every space is so important to us.

As for the photos, my Dad is a very sociable demanding person and he likes to be the controler of social interactions or "the party" (he is known for bringing his own speaker to parties to play music he likes), he pushes his way through and asks for things most people would think rude to ask, but he is charming and talks his way through it. I KNOW on the day he will push for photos and direct people as to what to do and pull her in,and I won{t be able to control that. It is a trait of him I have always hated, but we live far enough I don't have to deal with it often.

View Quoted Comment This is where having a good vendor team is important! If you make your photographer aware of the situation ahead of time, I guarantee they know how to handle people like your dad. I really hope it all works out for the best for you!

Tell you phonographer absolutely one picture only with the girlfriend. You can throw that picture away.

You might think about posting a couple of large, burly friends at the door to block any attempt by your father to bring in speakers or any other extraneous stuff. He sounds like a real bully, charming or not.