Advise about White and East Indian wedding!

If you wish to have a "half and half" wedding YOU need to research what that means before deciding anything you want. Basing it on "what you have heard" is not going to be sufficient. You also need to talk to your FS and see what HE has in mind for this wedding, as he is just as involved as you are. You can choose what you want for your wedding, but you need to be able to make educated decisions, and ones that are respectful of both cultures you are trying to honor.

Well I know that Maroon is a traditional color. It means good luck. My FS is involved but he is scared to tell his mom that this is our wedding and does not want to hurt her feeling because she is very traditional. Sometimes I feel that she wants to make me into an indian girl. Thank You for the advice.

Have you looked into what a Hindu wedding involves, versus a Christian (not "white") one involves? There is a lot more to it than colors. Marrying into a family that holds different beliefs and values then your own can be hard. You need to educate yourself about this, perhaps by talking to your soon to be mother in law about it! Respect for her feels will get you a lot farther in this situation.

When my sister married her husband, he is muslim not hindi but we are hispanic so it was very difficult to combined the two... so they had two cermonies one to represent his family and a very modest one to represent ours. If you want to do half and half like Analy said you really need to research everything and maybe sit down with FS and his family and find out which traditions they really would like to see incorporated and do the same for the american traditions you really want to have. Because the traditions are so different its going to take alot of compromise to pull it off ... and I agree with Analy again with regards to your FMIL ...respect for her traditionals and feelings will get you alot further than resisting being "made into an indian girl.". Good luck

If your FH's mom is your stereotypical Indian mom, you're fodder to her. She will turn into the Commander in Chief of the wedding planning it's not even going to be funny. That's just how they are - overbearing, bossy, demanding.

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Your man *needs* to take charge and respectfully and kindly explain to his mom that it's *your* wedding. No matter how you look at it, she'll get some feelings hurt but hey, that's just how it is. Sometimes there's no easy way of doing it.

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Good luck.

Haha yeah that is the right way of putting it. And I can't really talk to my soon to be mother-in-law because there is a language barrier. She barely speaks english.

But my FS's sisters are very understanding and I think they could help me a lot with their mom.

Omg, I just saw a show the other night where a couple (who was white btw) decided to do a hindu wedding. There is ALOT involved in them and they are alot of hard work. Also, I believe that the groom is the one who makes the main entrance in their culture. I'd just sit down with fh and decide what parts of the wedding will be american and which parts will be hidu. You guys shouldfirst decide exactly what you want and then both sit down and tell his mother what you have decided. I understand that her son is indian, but she needs to remember that you aren't and that the wedding is yours as well as her son's. I wish you the best =)

I googled hindu wedding traditions. This might help a little.

http://weddings.weddingchannel.com/wedding-planning-ideas/wedding-ceremony-ideas/articles/hindu-wedding-traditions.aspx?MsdVisit=1

Since the half you're asking for is the american and "american" is a white dress, it seems like you're not really meeting in the middle with a blue top, which is neither white nor red of any kind. By all means, do what you want, but american culture is very open about change and self expression whereas other countries and cultures are very traditional, especially the Indian culture. I believe that you should sit down and each choose parts you want to be special. If she cares about the food more than you then she gets that, and if you want the dress more, you get that. It'll be a bad start to the marriage if you offend her culture or tradition, and I think that you should just try to make compromises, and if she has problems with that have the FH talk to her about doing the same with compromises. It's not going to be super easy, but it will be important for your future.

I"m Indian and my FH is white. We are doing an American wedding. Then for my parents (they will be at the American wedding too), we are going to do a small ceremony in a temple. I'm not religious, but my Mom is. So I thought this would make her happy. Can you do that? Or a variation of?

Some of our best friends are both indian, but one is Christian and the other is Hindu. They had 2 separate weddings. Just know, in the Hindu culture, the MAN is the center of attention, unlike the woman is in our culture...it was very surprising to learn that

You can try some Indian clothes before wedding. Check if you are comfortable in them. Also can watch some Indian marriage videos, I am sure that can help a lot.

Good Luck