Advice for March 21st Wedding

Honestly, we were at this stage last night. For us, we made a list of folks that had to be there for us to be comfortable going forward, and on top of that was our mothers. His mother is in terrible shape, and I could not in good conscious ask her to choose between missing her son's wedding or her life, because that's where we're at. When you put it in that perspective, for us it was a no brainer. No money was worth it.


I said the same thing you did. How could we go forward when everyone who coughs will be ostracized? And with people getting penalized by their work for travelling? Our day is important, and we still want it. But we will postpone if we can and allow it to happen at a time when everyone can enjoy it. Its heartbreaking. I'm still broken that I went from excited to postponing. But we realized that the reality is we want our family there. And right now they won't be.
It's a personal choice. Trump just declared a state of emergency, so I would go to your vendors and see what they say. A lot of them might be understanding and allow you to move if you wish. We're planning an elopement when the quarantines settle a little, then our vow renewal later. It is what it is right now. Good luck! Whatever you choose make sure it's for you.

Have you spoken to vendors and venue regarding what options there are if need to postpone?

Hi Jesi. I'm so sorry. My wedding is 5/23 and I'm going through terrible turmoil trying to figure out if I should cancel or not. I live in Seattle and so we've been dealing with the effects of this for a good amount longer than the rest of the country (feels like it's been ages, really just about a week and a half to 2 weeks) so I've been worried for a while (all schools are cancelled until 4/24, gatherings of 250+ are banned, etc.). What I would do is educate yourself with the facts and I think you will have your answer.

- The virus is ULTRA contagious

- You can get it from an infected person breathing 6 feet away from you

- It lives on surfaces like plastic and stainless steel for as much as 3 days, and in the air for up to 3 hours

- There's evidence showing it can be passed from one person to another even before symptoms show up

What I've experienced here in Seattle since this started is - no one goes out to places where they're close to others unless they absolutely have to because it's so contagious. The virus is spreading like wildfire and I think many more people than the numbers (of confirmed cases) either have it or have been exposed. I totally understand how horrible a situation this is for you and I'm so sorry.

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Hi Mel,

Yes, I think most of our vendors, flights, and lodging can be postponed without penalty. We live in Wyoming and are flying to New Orleans for this small wedding. If we postpone, we would have to wait until the fall at the earliest to have it. We'd probably still be out a couple thousand dollars though, which is a lot of money to us. I realize in the long run that could be worth it, but the risk might be low enough with a small wedding to be okay?

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Thanks, Rachel. I had been reading up on all of that (my brother lives in Seattle but has been working in Pennsylvania for the last few weeks). I think we're just trying to settle into that reality and your perspective helps.

Wedding was also planned for March 21, but today we had to make the final call and postpone. It has been emotional turmoil, and we are still pretty upset since it was so close, only a week away. But ultimately we thought that besides the health concerns, the context of having a wedding celebration at the peak of a pandemic is not something we want to remember when we look back on it. We don’t wanna regret people not being there, and we don’t want there to be uneasiness in the air because people are anxious about the virus.



We are postponing a proper celebration till the end of the year. Since this is a huge blow, we still want something to look forward to and will be having a small, intimate ceremony next Saturday. Anyone else planning on having a private ceremony still? Much love to all who are also going through this!

View Quoted Comment We also decided to postpone. With the new military domestic travel ban, some of my immediate family members aren’t able to leave a 10 mile radius of their house. It actually feels like a huge relief to have made the decision. All of our vendors were so kind and understanding. We got almost all of our money back.