adult only

I'd keep it strictly to the adults! We don't have kids so there's no rule bending for us for sure but just like you said...you want them to have fun. I think they'll enjoy a kid free night!

I would keep it consistent and have no kids at all. When you start making exceptions for certain kids, even just one child in attendance, you offend your guests whom you told to find childcare in order to attend.

To avoid hard feelings and having to explain at your reception why some people were allowed to bring their kids (why certain kids were “special”, why those parents didn’t have to find/pay for a sitter when they did, etc.), it’s much easier to just make the rule NO kids for everyone.

We’re having an adult only ceremony & reception with the only kids there are the flower girl & ring bearer. No exceptions! We want to have fun & not have a bunch of kids running around screaming.

It should be an all or nothing thing.

You chose your wedding party because they are your closest friends or family, presumably. If the children are more well known to you than co-workers' children , or extended family children, or if your only sibs are in the wedding party so these kids are superclose or nieces and nephews, you can. For the same reasons you invited adults, these are the closest circle of kifs.
But if you are close to WP put not particularly close to their kids, and less close than to family kids you are saying no to, don't. ... It is worth telling people, I am the hostess, and just as I invited you, a close friend, but not a lot of adult people I am less close to, so I have invited a handful of children we are closest to not others. Decide on the basis of how close these kids are. Not that WP somehow ought to be an exception, if you hardly know the kids. I think instead of listening to mutterings of what's fair or not, which does not matter as this is a private party not a benefit you qualify for, you should use the same criteria as with adults, invite whole families you are closest to, parents only the rest. And not be cowed by who says "she got something I didn't get" playground stuff. ...

I recommend to keep it strictly for adults. No exceptions

I am allowing only one child, she's my flower girl and daughter of my officiant. I don't feel bad about the one exception because of the roles they are playing. I would say it depends on the situations of your wedding party too. Have they hinted at requesting to bring them or indicated that it would make their lives much easier etc? As a wedding guest, I would never begrudge the bride and groom for making a different call for the people closest in their lives that might not apply to the entire guest list.

Ours is adult only with the exception of the two kids in our bridal party since they’ll already be there. However, I think their parents have decided to take them back to the hotel (with a baby sitter) at the start of the reception.

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I agree with this post.

We're only allowing immediate family to bring their children, but that's also because my FH's best man and groomsmen are his father and brothers. Plus, my family lives in other countries, so they would have to bring their children if they were traveling for a long trip. We've asked our friends with small children how they felt about that decision, and they all said they were relieved because it gives them a night off from being mom and dad!

If none of the people in your wedding party are family, then I'd suggest to make the 'no children' a blanket rule, because I personally feel that family member's should be the ones able to bring their children. But that's just me.

No kids means no kids. It wouldn't be fair for only certain people to bring kids if everyone else can't.

We won't have really young kids but my FH cousins are very important to him. He wants his 16 yo cousin to be in the wedding and he has a 13 year old brother. Those are the only kids we are having which is fine by me. I think that you should keep it kids free. Fair to everyone and everyone could have fun

I am struggling with this as well. I have many people coming from out of the country and they have children (mostly 10 years or older). I have this on my side as well but they dont behave as well as they should. I want to make my wedding reception adult only but then there are guests who will have babies that will be between almost a year old to three years of age. I cant force the ones coming from out of the country to leave their children at home but I do want it adults only. Any suggestions?

I'm doing the same thing. Kids take up a huge part of the guest list in big families.
We are doing adults only and no kids outside of the wedding party. It sucks for many but since we are having alcohol and shenanigans it's adults only.

Agreed with others who have said all or nothing. Covid changed our plans, but originally we planned an adults only wedding and all of our friends who have kids had no issue with it at all and were looking forward to a kid free night. Even those with young kids who had to travel were not phased about leaving their little ones at home.