Addressing military titles

I'd keep it simple with Mr and Mrs. My FH and I are both active duty. The few military people.we are inviting are not getting their rate/rank. Then again we are including very little military insignia in our wedding.
Officers in the other hand may get offended. I don't deal with that side of the house unless I'm at work. Lol

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All of our active and actively drilling reserve military members will have titles. Although i have an uncle and he has a very dear friend whom have both retired should I just add their rank or leave it as Mr. John Doe.

View Quoted Comment If you are doing the active and reservists then gove the retired bubbas their credit as well. Rank(Ret) John Doe.

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Thanks you have been very helpful

View Quoted Comment What branch? You asked about abbrevieating. Most would go with abbreviations. SSGT, AEC, LCPL etc. I couldn't imagine writing out Chief Aviation Electricians Mate John Doe.

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Right now i have them all abbreviated like LCpl and Cpl and PFC and PVT. SSgt and Sgt they are all marines except my uncle is retired navy and I currently do not know his rank. An I was asking do I abbreviate like I said above or do I spell it out like( Lance Corporal John and Mrs. Jane doe). I currently have it (LCpl john and Mrs. Jane doe) or PFC John Doe and Miss Jane Dot.

If you're not having a military wedding, are you supposed to use ranks? I would assume you only use ranks for a military wedding, since they don't use ranks outside of work.
For example, you wouldn't address a wedding invite to "Professor Plum" or "Judge Ginsberg" or "Officer Jones"
But it would be "Dr. Dre" since "Dr." is in the same everyday category as "Mr." or "Ms."Really not sure!

View Quoted Comment I'm not sure what's concidered a "military wedding". My FH will be in dress blues(USMC) along with his groomsmen.

Sounds like you are having a military wedding. I would use ranks for all, whether active or retired.

It is only for formal wedding is, with formal engraved invitations , that you need to be so formal as to spell everything out. If you are having a nice but not formal wedding, and your invitations are artsy, with colors, on average stock, unlike the most formal invitations ( buff or white with no other colors, and with black engraved and embossed print and borders,)
then you may also relax the formality in addressing them, and in the wording of the invitation itself. No abbreviations, and wordy " at four o'clock in the afternoon" type stuff , gives way . Full Lieutenant Colonel James Ferrimoe, Retired. May become Lt. Col. Name Ret. and time may be written " at 4 pm". And due to the machine sorting of mail, etiquette experts say that the first priority, getting the invitation, is more important than fully spelling out all state and province names. Boston, MA zipcode is proper now even on the most formal things, not Boston, Massachusetts zipcode. Use all 2 letter state postal abbreviations. ... Honestly, for military, for titles you may be unsure of ( Honorable, Reverend, religious Sister or Brother, Dr , and any other ones, including academic degrees, as well as Ms. , Mrs. , or Miss, the best thing is to send someone a text or email and just say,. Since we call each other by first names, I am unsure of how you prefer to have mail addressed, or what title to use when introducing you. Forget all the etiquette conventions. Those are useful when you just do not know. But the most proper etiquette is to address people as they wish to be addressed. So ask them to write it down for you. You are not just addressing an invitation. You may be giving their name to a shower or engagement or bach or RD host, and writing 1-3 thank you notes, and doing a seating chart and table placecards, and introducing them to others. You need to know how to address envelopes, and what to say. Lots of married women will get ticked if they become Mrs. John Smith, when they go by Ms. Amanda Smith other Ms. Amanda Birthname.
And other married women are offended if you use their name, not Mr. And Mrs. His name. Because it used to be women dropped his name and used their own first name only when divorced. So just ask everyone , once. And do it in a direct individually addressed email, not a blast, to get the most answers. You will be a lot less embarrassed if you do not ask. Not to mention, some of these people you will now send things to, regularly, holidays or parties, baby announcements.

I cringe when people address me by my rank. I would only use rank if the invitation was being sent to a base. In my experience, many military members do not want to be addressed by rank outside of work. It is nice to feel like a person outside of the military. Some also look at it as a safety thing as well as in, we don't want a target on our backs. Just some different perspectives to think about.

View Quoted Comment Actually, there are others that get titles, called honorifics ( a designation of honor ). A judge is the Honorable, as are some holders of political offices. Some people with non medical doctorate degrees use the title Dr. though many prefer only to use it when at work or in academic setting. Those with religious vocations do to. And all of these are properly used when addressing invitations, even if it is not a formal wedding. For something totally informal, like a shower or birthday party, if you do send invitations, social titles do not get left off for clergy, judges, senators, or serving or fully retired officers . ( Not just finished 4-6 years, but retired with 20-30 years.)

I am in kind of this same predicament! We (FH and myself) are not federal military but state military, but my father is retired USAF, and two of the groomsmen are also state military. All of them will be in uniform. Our unit, other military friends and commanding officers are being invited as well, and military attire is welcome. Sooo...is it appropriate to send out "military" invitations, and if so, should we use ranks?

I was contemplating sending civilian-style invitations to our non-military friends and family, but wasn't sure if that was getting too complicated.

It will be a rather formal affair, so I'd planned to use full (not abbreviated) ranks, if at all.

Thanks for any advice!