Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

J
January 2018

a wedding without a church and all the etiquette

John, on September 13, 2019 at 9:26 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 16
Please do not take this message as a statement that opposes people who want "traditional" weddings, but have you attended any weddings the past few years that not only took place outside a church (without a religious person presiding over the thing), but where the dress was just simply casual and the food almost like a crockpot type of thing that you would have at work. I know a young couple who might be marrying fairly soon that just want to get married in their parent's backyard. They wish to pay for the entire thing themselves (both have good jobs) and pretty much want to toss the etiquette rule book out the window. On the other hand, they don't want to get married in a court and have like a reception at a parents house. They'd like the whole thing to take place at a parents house. They don't want groomsmen, a bridal party, a best man, none of that. Anyone been to a wedding of this nature with any creative ideas?


16 Comments

Latest activity by Olivia, on September 15, 2019 at 12:18 PM
  • Amber
    Master February 2020
    Amber ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    There's absolutely nothing wrong with that! Nothing wrong with a courthouse wedding, "traditional" wedding, or anything in between Smiley smile It can be as casual or formal as the couple wishes.
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    VIP June 2020
    Jessica ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    This is normal these days. I have been to a wedding like this and it is just as fun as a "traditional" wedding. I think whatever makes the couple happy is what they should do.

    • Reply
  • C
    Dedicated September 2019
    Cardioqueen ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Yup, this is a thing. Actually my aunt and uncle got married in her parents’ living room in the 70s, so I don’t think it’s a new thing. You can have an officiant come out to the house and marry you, then have a nice meal at home with your close friends and family. Depending on the size and budget they may want to look at catering / delivery for that meal instead of home cooking / crockpot because cooking for a crowd is a lot of work on your wedding day. I’m not sure how this is “without etiquette” — it’s just typically much less formal than a church wedding.
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    This is very normal. What do you need creative ideas on? It seems pretty cut and dry.
    • Reply
  • Cher Horowitz
    Master December 2019
    Cher Horowitz ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I think it's totally fine! As long as the guests are properly hosted, having a non-traditional wedding is a great idea!

    • Reply
  • Ivy ORP
    VIP October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    I've been to several of these weddings. We're kind of throwing a reception like this, but we will have a caterer and the dress. I do always caution people on DIY meals at weddings for food safety and other issues, but the rest should be whatever the couple wants.

    • Reply
  • Anna
    Super August 2020
    Anna ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Sounds like a great time! My co-worker did a surprise wedding. Everyone thought they were going over for a BBQ and then BAM- wedding time. So awesome and I love the idea for whomever it suits.

    • Reply
  • Sara
    Super October 2019
    Sara ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    This is totally fine. The last wedding I went to was on the back lawn of a bed and breakfast owned by the grooms friend, they had their friends officiate the wedding, there were no religious connotations throughout the ceremony, and they had pizza and pasta buffet catered by a local restaurant.

    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Devoted November 2019
    Nicole ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Yes! I went to a wedding that took place in a park and used the park building for the reception. There was no meal served, but there were snacks, a keg, and you could BYOB as well. It was super casual and a perfect fit for the couple.

    • Reply
  • Samantha
    VIP October 2020
    Samantha ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My sister had a wedding in my parents’ front yard with a reception in the backyard, super casual with home cooking and yard games. It was really fun.
    • Reply
  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I haven't but I've seen a lot of non traditional weddings done here on WW
    • Reply
  • Mrsbdg
    Champion August 2017
    Mrsbdg ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    I’ve been to a few of these lately because almost all of my friends don’t ascribe to a religion or an organized religion. I recently went to a wedding where everything was in a cocktail lounge. It was gorgeous and very well organized

    I don’t see getting married outside the church as “throwing the etiquette rule book out the window.” Etiquette is a way of hosting. As long as they are being safe, gracious, well-organized, and thoughtful hosts I see no reason to consider it against etiquette.
    • Reply
  • Jeanie
    Super February 2020
    Jeanie ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    If that’s what the couple wants, that’s fine. I’ve been to a backyard wedding that still had the bridal gown and whatnot. I’ve also been to a small restaurant wedding where he wore a simple suit and she wore a white ensemble, but not much else wedding-like was there. A wedding should represent the couple, not what society thinks or wants.
    • Reply
  • Megan
    Expert October 2019
    Megan ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My dad and step-mom did this. It was their third marriage, neither are religious, so they found someone who officiated non-religious people. They made all their own food, set up a buffet line in their garage, and had canopys over buffet tables for guests. Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Christine
    Dedicated October 2020
    Christine ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    That's totally fine. My sister and BL got married in my parents backyard. Nothing religious about the wedding. They had a county judge come and officiate the ceremony and then had a small company cater the food. There was nothing traditional about her wedding and it was a perfect day.

    • Reply
  • O
    Dedicated November 2019
    Olivia ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Its not unusual. I went to one many years ago. It was all done in the backyard, very small wedding. They brought in a DJ and dancefloor, had a small arch where they got married while all the guests sat at tables and chairs around them, all rented. Arch was removed after ceremony and the food was either catered or the bride made everything herself, she loves to cook, and it was simple Mexican food so she might have done it herself. The food was in those giant silver trays covered with foil. They rented 2 margharita slushie machines and had cake and other snacks/desserts. It was all very simple and relaxed and was overall a very lovely fun evening. Nothing mattered except everyone having food and enjoying everyone else's company while celebrating a marriage. I don't think the bride even wore an actual wedding dress, just a nice white dress, and the groom was just dressed nicely too, no tux or suit.
    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

WeddingWire article topics