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Just Said Yes March 2025

a little disappointed on my friend bride to be

Kristine, on June 10, 2019 at 3:08 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 6

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Hi, so one of my close friend are getting marry next year. I’ve been her friend about 10 years now since high school and college. I also had help her with her planing, you know, going out of my way to help her out because she is my friend and was there for me in time when no one else was. So today she just told me that she will have someone else as her MOH and I won’t even going to be her bridesmaid due to the couple’s financial situation. Her and her fiancé kept thanking me and said that they really appreciate my help and they are glad that I was there. But I still feel hurts and want to just quit helping and I knowing me, I remembered the time she was there for me so I will keep helping her in anything that she need. In fact, I don’t know how to deal with my own feeling, I feel hurts and disappointed. I don’t know how to get over it, and pretend that it all cool. We plan to travel internationally just the two of us in the two months and I don’t want it to feel awkward between us. What should I do? How should I deal with my own feelings?

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Kristine, on June 10, 2019 at 8:08 PM

VIP June 2019
Formerbride · on June 10, 2019 at 6:36 AM
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That's hard because she explained that they couldn't have you in the wedding party for financial reasons. Knowing that, she should have never enlisted your help with planning. I think the best thing you can do is express that you're upset. Tell her simply that you were hoping to be in the wedding party and your disappointed that you're not. If you choose to help her going forward you can't blame her, that will be your choice.
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Super September 2019
ASMini914 · on June 10, 2019 at 7:45 AM
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First, take a deep breath, it’s totally ok to feel upset, and disappointed. Allow yourself to feel sad for a day, but then you need to take a step back and realize the good that came out of this:

its obvious that that your friend truly cares about you and your friendship. She could have just never said anything to you about not being her MoH, like a lot of people do. She could have waited until you realized after she just never asked. Instead it sounds like she really made an effort to not only tell you, but also explain why (and a very reasonable explanation).

It also sounds like they have a really really small wedding party, so it could have come down to just family or something.
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Just Said Yes March 2025
Kristine · on June 10, 2019 at 9:55 AM
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I understand in my head with reason and all but so hard with my feeling like this. Idk if I should just let her know that’s a bit disappointed and stuff and it’s okay.
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Just Said Yes March 2025
Kristine · on June 10, 2019 at 10:00 AM
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I am not blaming her in this case. And you are right I put myself in this situation. I am just trying cope with my own feeling as of things still need to be done and I can’t leave when I already promise that I’ll be there. It just kind of hard to face her, acting that every is alright when actually inside something upset me. I’ve talk to her about anything but I feel lime this is such a sensitive matter so I don’t know how to cope with it.
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Super August 2021
Wendy · on June 10, 2019 at 4:00 PM
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So she’s only having a MOH?? And who is it?? Is it a family member??? Because if that’s the case I’d completely understand... I’m having my sister as my MOH and I know one of my bff’s that I’ve known for 12yrs will feel a certain way once she knows because she keeps asking me if I’ve chosen my girls yet.. I still haven’t decided about bridesmaids but I’m leaving towards no... your friend explained her situation, so depending on the answers above, I’d either explain to her how I feel, or deal w my emotions on my own before the trip...
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Just Said Yes March 2025
Kristine · on June 10, 2019 at 8:08 PM
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So her MOH is a friend who she met in college. But actually our problems has been solved and thank you so much guys for the advices. So I decided to talk it out with her.
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