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5 year destination Vow Renewal after conflict wedding

Fwbride, on March 26, 2020 at 11:22 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 7

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So, long story short, my wedding didn’t go as planned. Husband’s sister caused a lot of stress the week of my wedding which then made me uncomfortable the day of having her in my bridal party. Husband and I have discussed having a 5 year “elopement” style vow renewal in Bora Bora. He wants to bring his mom, sister, and brother and my close family too, but I’d rather just do our best friends and then turn it into a couples vacation. I don’t think I’ll ever be 100% with his sister after everything that went down. She asked me to be in her bridal party for her wedding next year and I told her no and explained why. I would much rather just not bring our families and risk ruining this again. I don’t feel selfish because I already let her be a part of my BP once for him and this time I want it my way. Am I wrong..?

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Latest activity by Cyndy, on March 27, 2020 at 10:14 AM

Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on March 26, 2020 at 11:55 PM
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Absolutely not wrong! If she caused you stress, not sure why you guys would want to include family? I say just a private vow renewal (no drama) or a few couples you can guarantee no drama.
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Master 0000
Judith · on March 27, 2020 at 12:07 AM
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A couples vacation sounds like the better choice by far.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on March 27, 2020 at 12:13 AM
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I don’t think you’re wrong for wanting to be comfortable at your own event
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Super September 2019
Courtney · on March 27, 2020 at 7:04 AM
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No! I wouldn’t invite the person that caused a large part of the original discomfort.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on March 27, 2020 at 8:10 AM
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She's the whole reason you're doing a vow renewal, I don't know why he'd want her there to potentially ruin that as well.
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Dedicated September 2020
Sabrina · on March 27, 2020 at 9:13 AM
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I think honestly and communication is key. Usually elopements are more about the couple then they are about family. I know several couples who have done a second wedding and only invited about 5 couples and turned it into a vacation together. If our friends had money to spend we will do the same thing for my 40th/ 10 year wedding anniversary.

Good luck. Just ensure the lines of communication are open!
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Master May 2019
Cyndy · on March 27, 2020 at 10:14 AM
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It sounds like she was the reason you are doing this again so personally I would say no to her coming. Having friends sounds like way more fun anyway. I would just remind your husband of the problem from before and stand your ground on this one.
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5 year destination Vow Renewal after conflict wedding

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