2 Weddings 1 Month

If she’s close with your FH and they’ll have a lot of the same guests, maybe have him suggest having the wedding a month before yours or a month after yours so that their family has more time between travels? Is there a reason they want it that month specifically in terms of their schedules, or do they just like the month? Maybe find out

I wouldn't handle anything. Keep planning like you are and leave it up to his family to decide whether or not they can make two weddings back to back. My FH's cousin is getting married the weekend before us, and his wedding is out of town. All of FH's family still plans to go to both.

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The timing has something to do with when they are moving to the area. She had told him May but now his Aunt (her mom) is saying June. May or July would be no issue or even the first weekend of June to give some room to guests.

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If we all lived in one town and anyone was local this wouldn't be an issue or concern at all. No one lives near us and no one lives in the town where we are getting married. It's not like they have to travel one week and then stay local for the next, it's basically asking people to come to two destination weddings in one month (possible week or so).

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If you are truly concerned then you can change your date. Have STDs gone out yet? If not, then it's not too late.

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I understand! Maybe the timing hasn't even occurred to her. I would have your FH bring it up with her, not in a "you can't have your wedding close to ours" way, but in a "how can we coordinate this so it will best accommodate our family?" way.

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We have deposit's down on venue and almost all the vendors. We booked our venue in early February before they were engaged.

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Yes!! This is exactly what I was trying to come up with and couldn't for the life of me formulate!! Thank you!!

There’s really nothing you can do here besides change your date if you feel that it’s an inconvenience to your guests.

You're not being a bridezilla at all, this is a really practical question! Definitely have your FH discuss it with his cousin, since her family might not be thinking about this yet. Just remind them when and where your wedding is, and mention that you're worried about the family not being able to fly out to DC and then NC basically back-to-back.

I would start telling your family your date. not sending out the STD yet but word of mouth. That way it's known to plan for yours.

If they are truly good friends, why don't they have a conversation about it and express their concerns. If neither one of you has booked a venue for the day, then someone should be able to move. If you have already booked, you could ask them to move their day due to your concerns. My FH's family best friend got engaged after us and was actually going to pick the same day! His mom flat out called his friends mom and said "no that's not happening, they already booked it". While not the same, you have to stand up for your day and it sounds like you have done the leg work. If you express the concern and communicate with family the day you have planned, then they will most likely be asked to move from their other family members.

I was actually in this situation with one of my cousins - we'd already booked our venue and they were looking at a date two weeks beforehand. It was tricky because her possible date happened to be our late grandfather's birthday so there was some sentimentality attached to it. I just called her up and expressed my concerns. We agreed most of our family would probably travel to both anyway (our family is crazy like that) and to coordinate closely if she picked that date, and I felt better getting my concerns off my chest. In the end, she picked a later date anyway. I think if you're close the best thing to do is talk it out, but you can't tell them not to pick a certain date. Hope this helps.

Thank you ladies of WW for the advice and similar situations. FH is going to talk to his family and pass along the concerns we have with too close of a date and the implications this could have on the family with expenses of travel and time off work too close together. This is why I came to the board's to ask so thank you all so much!

My cousin got engaged 2 or 3 days before me and his wedding is 3 weeks after mine. Another cousin recently got engaged and her wedding is 1 month before mine. We are still planning our weddings like normal. There will be some family members who won't go to all but that's just the way it is - at least we will be able to see them at one of the weddings to chat and I won't have any hard feelings if it's not mine. I know you would love for everyone to come to yours but it's not the end of the world. Good luck!