- Just Said Yes
- 10 points
Happily married 🎉
October 1, 2011
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The Engagement The Fiance Is the sweetest guy I have ever met. Sweet, gentle, loving, caring -- these are all words to describe him. Basically, he is the opposite of me in every way. While I am choleric-melancholic, he is phlegmatic-sanguine. But he also has the great characteristics of a good choleric; he's disciplined, self-motivated, independent, and a good planner. (I, of course, don't think this is fair because it basically only leaves me with my melancholic and the not-so-good things about my choleric to call my own. Ha!) He is the type of guy who never shows up without flowers and/or some little thing he found and thought I would like. He calls me to ask things like, "is your dorm room warm enough, because I'm on the aisle with the space heaters at Wal-Mart and I want to get you one if it's not...". The consensus most often reached by relatives and acquaintances? he's a good catch. hold on to him. And I do plan to hold on to him... forever, in fact. The Preface Jose proposed to me one year ago today, on August 10, 2009. It is also the feast of my patron, St. Lawrence, so the day was already super special to me before it became the anniversary of our engagement. It's flanked by the feasts of some of my absolute favorites as well, including St. John Vianney, St. Dominic, St. Edith Stein, and St. Clare of Assissi. August is a wonderful saint month. Most people are very offended by the next part, and if I had a dollar for every time someone has told me it was wrong... well, you get it: We planned the proposal. Together. (You may go take a break to breathe fire now if desired.) Why, you ask? My family wanted to throw an engagement party, and they wanted to be at least in the same state when it happened. Well, Jose was only going to be in my hometown for three days that summer, which left a very narrow window of time. I might have micromanaged a little too much of this process, but I assure you, it was all at Jose's bidding. Let me prologue this by saying that Jose is full of surprises. This just couldn't be one of them. I think most people are dismayed by this because the proposal is often one of the only well-thought-out and joyful surprises a man gives his woman. But this isn't the case with Jose. (For example, he came to visit for two days at the beginning of this summer, and he took me out for a sunset boat ride and then dinner at an amazing Italian restaurant in a classy area of town... it was a huge surprise and totally fun!) The Proposal The proposal took place at the place in Houston - and possibly anywhere - that is most special to me: the side chapel at Annunciation Catholic Church in Downtown Houston. It used to be my family's parish when I was growing up. I used to go in there after Mass and pray before the icon of Our Lady of Perpetual Help (! I love icons !). I would ask her to show me my vocation. That chapel was very important to me. The smell of the candles, the beautiful icon... they became a constant in my life. It was hard to part with it when I went away to join the monastery for what I thought would be forever (a story for another day). Turns out, it wasn't forever - it was a year - and that chapel became an even bigger part of my life after returning to Houston. It became a hideout of sorts, because there were just too many people who wanted to know why I was home, what had happened, if I was on vacation from the monastery.... all well-intentioned questions, but questions I couldn't answer without bursting into tears for a few months. So that chapel protected me, and I would ask Mary even more fervently than before what I was supposed to do with my life, since Plan A hadn't worked out. I thought it only fitting to go back to that chapel for the proposal if I had any say in it, since the proposal was a testament to the fact that Our Lady had answered my prayers. But the original schedule for the engagement, which is as follows, did not work out as we planned (The best way to make God laugh is to tell Him your plans. -Mother Teresa) 10:30 a.m. leave house for 12:10 Mass downtown -pick up Jose from my grandparents house on the way there- 11:55 arrive at church and pray for a bit before Mass 12:10 Mass 12:50 go to side chapel. Say Yes to Jose's proposal, be happy, etc. 1:10 leave blissfully happy(before they lock the church) to begin our new life as engaged folks. Go to lunch at surprise restaurant mom has printed the address to. The actual schedule went more like this: 10:50 can't find certain makeup items I planned on using 11:30 a.m. arrive at grandparents to pick up Jose. Realize that he's not done showering or getting ready yet.* This starts to get scary. 11:40 leave for Mass. It's OK we're running late-- I can drive fast and still make our perfect proposal turn out right. 11:50 get speeding ticket for going 80 in a 60 because we didn't leave the house on time. Start crying (but only after the cop is gone; my attempt to fake it to circumvent the ticket was unsuccessful) 12:30 arrive at Mass. During the Our Father. Have muffled conversation with Jose about whether or not we should go to Communion. 12:55 Say Yes to Jose's proposal. Try not to think about the $300 speeding ticket while he's down on one knee. 1:20 Depart for said restaurant. Realize that I have no sense of direction and have no idea how to get there. End up at La Madeleine and have a great, though unplanned, lunch. *There was a good reason for Jose's tardiness. Wal-Mart is NOT close to my grandparents house. But that did not deter Jose from jogging there to get flowers for me. (Did I mention it's not close at all?) Not only did he run all the way there, but he ran back with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. True love? I think so. The morals of the story? 1. Things do not always go as planned. And I am no model of that hideous "go with the flow" mantra (only hideous to me because I'll probably never master it) -- "flow," to me, is having the day planned out point-by-point, andfollowing it. But Jose is helping me learn to embrace spontaneity. :) ... and 2. Planned proposals can make just as good stories as unplanned ones. AND WE WERE ENGAGED!
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