Pros & Cons

I am married and this may sound silly but now I feel things are official. I mean we have always been committed but before it felt as if we are playing house and now for me our relationship is more sacred. I love saying my husband and knowing we are more spiritually bound. I am in the process of changing my last name and little things like that bring me joy.

I feel the same as Kristen. I've been with FH for 13 years now so I keep telling people that I feel like we're already married but it will be different. I feel like we've been in limbo for a long time and just not moving forward. Now that we're engaged I feel like FH is a lot more relaxed and I'm so much happier. I'm looking forward to moving forward with our relationship and buying a home together. I think what I'm not looking forward to is the stress that can come along with learning about being married (how should we file our taxes? Homeowners insurance, etc).

View Quoted Comment I agree with this 100%
People say “oh if you live together there’s no change it’s just a piece of paper.”
But It felt so much difference once we were married. Our relationship felt stronger, more committed, more united. I love it!

I agree with Kristen! We share a home and we have children together (our daughter and step son) I honestly can’t wait to be one of “them”. Lol as silly as it sounds I can’t wait to share their last name.

I agree with basically what everyone else was saying, but the one thing I’m most excited for is changing my last name. It means a lot to me to be able to change it because I’m going from being associated with a very broken not so great family to being associated with an amazing family. I’m not looking forward to having to change everything over though, I know it’ll be a pain and expensive but once it’s done I’ll be happy!

View Quoted Comment Just a pieve of papet?! Lol. Everything changes LEGALLY.

View Quoted Comment Ok thanks for sharing. Many of my loved ones (mothers) gave their children their last name and not the fathers.

View Quoted Comment That's the complete opposite for me. I dont plan on changing my last name. Nearly two thirds of the world has tge practice where women do not change their last name after marriage. Never agreed with the American tradition of doing that.


Thabks for sharing and congrats.

View Quoted Comment Okay thanks for sharing. I don't plan on changing my last name

In some countries, children get both their mother and father's last names and the wife doesn't change, so I think it's completely acceptable not to change your last name.


I'm going to change mine but only because my parents had a son who can carry on my dad's last name. That was very important to me.
I know it can be difficult changing your last name but I'm still doing it. My brother's ex-wife kept his last name and she's been remarried twice since then lol

I'm excited for things to be official and to call him my husband 😍 for his sake, I'm looking forward to getting him on my insurance since it's good + cheap and his is expensive and not as good.


We are waiting for marriage so I'm looking forward to (finally!) being intimate with him, but not looking forward to going on birth control and having to be concerned about accidentally getting pregnant.

View Quoted Comment As someone who has been on birth control for 15 years, it's not so bad. I didn't start taking it to prevent pregnancy but now that I'm using it for that, I highly recommend lo loestrin fe. It hasn't affected my weight at all and has mellowed me out vs making me emotional. Of course, I would recommend seeing a gynecologist first and going over your options.

View Quoted Comment This is really helpful! I had wanted the implant but my gynecologist suggested something shorter term since I've never done hormones before. I've been leaning toward the patch so I don't have to take it every day. Weight gain has been my biggest concern

View Quoted Comment I've forgotten the pill maybe 4 times over 15 years. It helps if you're used to taking other vitamins or supplements but you would get used to it. I think they tell you to use a back up for the first month or so. Everyone is different but I think low hormone birth control is the best for me.

View Quoted Comment Okay Tiger Bride, thank you for sharing

View Quoted Comment I absolutely hated the pill. I gained weight from it and it made me feel nauseous.

View Quoted Comment I recommend the nuvaring if one has to get on hormonal contraceptives. See if that is a good option or not for you.

View Quoted Comment I had that issue with one I took too. Even when I started lo loestrin fe I had about a week of being nauseous but now I'm good. I'm just too scared to try tomhe nuvaring, shot, patch, etc. I'm way too big of a wuss when it comes to pain lol

View Quoted Comment Be careful with lo loestrin! I got pregnant while on that pill! It has lower hormone levels so higher chance of pregnancy. I would also caution against the pill because they can cause blood clots. When I worked at a physical therapy center we had a 19 year old girl who had lost mobility in half her body after suffering from blood clots and a stroke from her birth control pills. There is a copper ring you can use that has no hormones and is much safer.

View Quoted Comment Huh? Nuvaring shouldn't be painful. You insert ot similar to a tampon and keep it in for three weeks and taje it out one week per month for your cycle. You're also allowed to take it out each time you have sex but you must insert it back within a short time frame after your significant other finished.