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Just Said Yes October 2020

Post wedding feels

Brooklyn, on October 22, 2020 at 6:29 PM Posted in Married Life 0 9

My wedding turned out how I envisioned in my head, I married the man of my dreams, decor/ flowers were beautiful, and everything I had control on turned out great! But... I still feel a little sad about my guests. We got married on October 3rd, we invited 150 people and MAYBE 80 were able to attend. A lot of our guests were scared about covid so some didn't come even though they RSVP and a lot of them left after dinner... by 9 there was really only the wedding party, their s/o's and are immediate family. There is nothing about the day I would change but there's a part of me that's bummed that my guest didn't have a good time.. Should I feel this way? I feel so dumb even asking because that's not what its about but I can't stop thinking about it. I can't control people's emotions about a global pandemic and I dont want to put them in a position were theyre uncomfortable but this is how im feeling...

9 Comments

Latest activity by Talia, on October 23, 2020 at 11:08 AM
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
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    I missed it.. What makes you feel like guests didn’t have a good time?
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  • B
    Just Said Yes October 2020
    Brooklyn ·
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    It was just the vibe i was getting from them...i know it sounds dumb


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  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
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    No one will ever be as happy as you and your FH. And the fact that you two had a great time is wonderful!!! From the proposal to the engagement stage to the wedding day.... it’s all about the couple. Plus, if your guests are close family and friends who care for the two of you, I guarantee that they had an enjoyable time. So perhaps your expectations are causing the trouble.
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  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
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    Ooops.... i should have said husband not FH. Lol. Congrats!!!!
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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    I wonder a lot of times if people have not built up an idea of a magical wedding feeling, by focusing on every detail for so long, and looking at pictures, tv, movies. And have an idea nothing can match, so disappointment follows even the best experience. Rather like many little kids at Christmas. They hear about family maki g plans, months before, family coming to visit. Constant sight and talk for six weeks, well before Thanksgiving, everything includes it. And Christmas they rush to open gifts, one after another, then the big let-down, no more to look forward to. And they get a little sad and lost. Let down, though nothing went wrong. ... In real life, how often do even 60 friends and family come to spend even 4 hours celebrating you? From 30 minutes before the doors opened, people already dressed up, coming to take their seats, til after dinner, that is a long time. Add on time getting there and back, it is as long as most 8pm to midnight special parties. Most real weddings have the guests for 3.5-4.5 hours. I see so many timelines and plans brides make to last 6-7 hours then assume an after party. But for a reality check, the majority of venues including ceremony and reception, plan 5 hour slots. Set up to clean up. I am sorry covid hovered over your wedding. But go through the wedding talking with a guest, or when you see your pictures, it did likely slip by fast. Nothing to feel sad or short changed about. 🙂 Give it a few weeks to put things in perspective, make an album, write notes and remember nice moments here and there, and time will stretch out again. Don't focus on what did not happen. Most of your guests had a whole afternoon, or evening, and a core group had more.
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  • Corrin
    Dedicated October 2021
    Corrin ·
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    It's totally normal to feel disappointed, and it's definitely not dumb.

    Most people have a wedding so that they can enjoy all of their friends and family around them at one time, celebrating something important to them. And having everyone there together in one room only happens maybe once or twice in your life. The fact that you didn't get to have everyone there is definitely a disappointment, and you're totally normal for feeling bummed about it.

    Let yourself feel bummed for a little bit, but also remember that everyone you invited also wanted to be there for you guys, even though some of them couldn't because of COVID. They care about you all the same! It wasn't what you wanted, BUT it was wonderful regardless. You have a lot of good things to focus on too - your new hub, your friends and family that did make it, the fact that it went so perfectly otherwise! Try not to let one bad thing cloud the vision of the whole thing. It'll take time to feel better about it, but when you start feeling bad try thinking about all the good that came of it.

    Hope you feel better!

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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    It’s also something where you cannot satisfy everyone ya know?
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  • Margaret
    Master October 2020
    Margaret ·
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    I doubt they didn't have a good time. I'm sure it was fine. I'll be honest, I'm of an age now that I doubt I'd stay out much past 9-930 for anything. Even on our wedding day we were in bed by 10pm (keep in mind we had a sunrise wedding and I woke up at 330am). I'm sure what you're feeling is normal, but I wouldn't think for a moment because some left early it's because they weren't having fun.

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  • Talia
    Super October 2020
    Talia ·
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    I totally get where you're coming from here. We married 10.10 had about 95 or so guest and invited 136. Some couldn't come because of the fear of covid, some couldn't come because of other reasons. Around 9 or so I noticed a lot of empty seats but then I also noticed my husband, my cousins,sister, brother and my family having a ball on the dance floor. That's all I could have asked for is for us to have a great time!

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