Melody
Savvy April 2021

My wedding disaster... (trigger warning)

Melody, on May 26, 2021 at 1:48 AM Posted in Married Life 0 37
Saved
Reply
Looking through wedding “do over” posts, because my wedding ended with my dad head butting my husband, blood all over me (great in White!) My friend who just got home from the Marines sat with me and let me cry and scream, while my whole family literally blew up in a huge fight all around us... I walked away from my friend for 10 minutes and went to check on my mom who’s in poor health, and came back to see my marine friend had left our house and crashed down the road where he died on the scene... I wish we’d just have eloped. I want to do something just my hubby and I to focus solely on our love and commitment and to get to go to bed embracing that love, not go to bed covered in tears and blood with a broken heart... My dad and husband have worked through their stuff, but I will never forgive my dad for starting the fight that ruined my perfect wedding. What places come to your mind when you picture a private “do over”?

37 Comments

Latest activity by Rae, on May 27, 2021 at 6:40 PM
  • L
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    I am sorry for the death and loss of your friend. I truly am sorry.
    • Reply
  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
    • Flag
    Am I reading this right? .... Your friend died?! The same one that was comforting you at your wedding ?? If that’s the case Um.... okay.... first off I’m really sorry... I think that might be the most important thing you should focus on right now. It’s unfortunate that your family doesn’t have any class and didn’t respect you and your fiancé on your wedding day, but I think the bigger picture here is the fact that your friend who was close enough to you that they were comforting you on your wedding night died that same night unless I’m reading that wrong.. That’s probably what you should be focusing on right now is reaching out to the family to ask how they are doing seeing as how you were what I’m assuming one of the last people to see him/her.
    • Reply
  • Ava
    VIP May 2022
    Ava ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    OMG right?! This can’t be a real post. This sounds 100% made up
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Yes that’s what you’re reading... I had reached out to his sister the next morning and had a talk with his dad after the funeral services... I made sure his family knew he spent his last moments on earth doing what he was best at, and that was being supportive... He is so missed already. There’s a dark cloud without him and my heart is so broken! I was hoping my photographers got some good pictures of him, but they didn’t... I still can’t even believe this has happened!
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you...
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Ava, first off, I don’t know why anyone would make something like this up? How awful... This is 100% my life, and I’m just lost and looking for some good and a little support to get through all of this... My wedding disaster... (trigger warning) 1
    My wedding disaster... (trigger warning) 2

    My wedding disaster... (trigger warning) 3


    • Reply
  • Ava
    VIP May 2022
    Ava ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    That is a horrible tragedy. My heart goes out to his family.
    The reason I said it sounded made up is because that portion (a tragic death at your wedding!) was pretty much glossed over in your story like a minute detail. The focus was on how you were robbed of your dream wedding, instead of how a young man was just robbed of his life. I guess when I put myself in the place of the writer I just couldn’t imagine ever tossing out the fact a close friend of mine recently passed leaving my wedding like it was a small detail compared to getting a “do over” of my party. I understand someone being disappointed their family couldn’t act right at their event, but I just couldn’t relate to focusing on that under the circumstances, or on wanting to plan a redo of my wedding right after that happened.

    • Reply
  • Taylor
    Dedicated October 2021
    Taylor ·
    • Flag
    I do not have any advice, but am so sorry to read all of this, especially the loss of your friend.
    • Reply
  • M
    February 2021
    Marie ·
    • Flag

    I thought your Dad doing that on your husband was the worst thing that happened but I can't believe it, you had two worse nightmares in just one night. My condolences to you and your friend's family. I can't imagine how they are going through this tragedy.

    • Reply
  • Kk
    Devoted October 2021
    Kk ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Everyone greives differently. If her profile is correct, her wedding was almost two months ago. Maybe planning a wedding redo of her wedding is what will help her heal. Either way it's no one's place on this board to tell anyone else how to grieve.
    • Reply
  • Dj Tanner
    June 2021
    Dj Tanner ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Absolutely, everyone grieves differently. But when explaining a story it was just a bit shocking to hear a greater emphasis on how her dress was covered in blood, vs her friends accident. She said he got into a car crash… Was it because he was drinking at the wedding? If that happened to me, I would not only feel so sad, but maybe even a little guilt. Again I know everyone grieves differently, but If I were in that situation, I think after a month I would be a lot less worried about a wedding do over. Not saying her wanting to do a wedding do over is wrong at all and she’s not wrong for wanting to do it a little over a month after, but it was just a shock to me because I just can’t picture ever viewing the situation like that only after such a short time.
    • Reply
  • Msalberts
    Master October 2021
    Msalberts ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I felt the same way upon reading this the first time. There was a tinge of doubt in the back of my mind. This is an absolute horrible story! And yes, 100% agree that everyone grieves differently.

    • Reply
  • Ava
    VIP May 2022
    Ava ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I wasn’t telling anyone how to grieve. I was simply explaining why I had initially perceived this as possibly not being a real post.
    • Reply
  • C
    Super April 2020
    Cool Online ·
    • Flag
    I’m so sorry for your loss. Honestly, I don’t think a “redo” is going to get rid of these terrible memories. I recommend seeking counseling for your grief and plan a beautiful trip with your husband for a little bit from now when you two can properly relax and enjoy time just there two of you.
    • Reply
  • Soon To Be Mrs. Stewart
    Devoted August 2022
    Soon To Be Mrs. Stewart ·
    • Flag

    OMG, I'm so sorry for you and the way things went. My condolences to for your friend passing.

    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I understand, it has been about 2 months now, and until the last couple weeks, this post would have been very different. But his family has found the peace they needed, and I’m working through my grief. Death is different for me than most also, my daughter died in 2013, and after losing her, no other death could ever be as hard. He died at 12:38 am on Easter morning and his very Christian family found so much solace that the Lord took him on such a special day. Their peace has helped me cope much easier.


    I didn’t elaborate on the details of my grief, because when people think of weddings, and especially wedding disasters, that is not what they expect to hear! I was actually blocked from a wedding group on FB because the OP posted a question asking “worst things that go wrong at weddings” and my fresh grief and elaboration wasn’t what they expected, and so my comment was reported.
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you...
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you. He was a wreckless driver unfortunately, and he’s been in multiple crashes, everyone always told him he needed to slow down or it would catch him one day. We’re grateful no one else was injured badly in the accident. One of our friends was riding passenger with him, but he only had a few broken ribs and bruises. It just doesn’t even seem real still...
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you, yes I got married on 4-3-21, and he died just after midnight, on Easter. I’m just looking and hoping for a little something good to look forward to.
    • Reply
  • Melody
    Savvy April 2021
    Melody ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    People don’t always know how to handle grief, and every situation is different. I couldn’t even talk about my wedding for a few weeks after because I would break into a ball of tears over his death. Watching his family get through their days has helped me, because they are who I feel the most heartache for. He was a wreckless driver all our life. He’s been in other crashes, but nothing too major. We all told him he needed to slow down, but he put a new tuner in his truck the week before our wedding, and he was trying to show off. The road by my house has a big awkwardly laid out turn up to the stop sign. The investigation concluded he was doing about 65mph when he went off the road where it turned, and he rolled his truck, and it smashed his skull.


    In my original post, I didn’t elaborate on his death, I figured if I had any comments from people that had supportive ideas, that I could share more details on what happened. I wanted to “read” the audience, as I’ve been blocked on some FB posts because they said it was too tragic to post about... they wanted real, this is my reality.
    This has been a hard thing to talk about to other brides, because no one wants to think this could happen on their wedding day, but it does. I didn’t want the comments I’ve had from people in our community who say “I’m so sorry this happened on your wedding day”, ya, obviously me too, but I’m mostly sorry it happened at all!!! I’m so sorry I didn’t listen to my husband, who wanted to run off to Vegas alone to get married, because maybe if Morgan wasn’t driving on the awful road by my house that night, maybe he would still be here. The guilt is there, even without alcohol involved, because I know how many people wreck there, but he’s lived here most of his life, and I never in a million years would’ve thought he’d miss that turn...
    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

WeddingWire article topics