L
Savvy August 2020

Legally Married on Original Date: Bachelorette and Wedding Shower Later on?

Lee, on June 1, 2020 at 6:34 PM Posted in Parties and Events 2 8
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Hello,

I know many of you, like myself, have needed to postpone the big wedding and reception. Personally, we were originally going to get married in August, but are now postponed to September 2021. Due to a close family member likely not surviving to our new September 2021 date, we are still going to "elope" with immediate family on our original date in August so that I can have photos with her to cherish.

My question is: since we will technically be married on our August 2020 date, do we still have our bachelor/bachelorette parties and wedding shower? It is not so much a "money grab" but these events were something we were looking forward to since it will be one of the rare occasion where both people from both my FH's family and my family are together, as we usually only go to one family or the other on holidays.

We have polled some of our family and it seems like the general consensus is that people feel like we shouldn't lose out on these events because of the pandemic.

What are others doing who are getting legally married on the original date, but still planning on having the big party later on? Are you still doing any of the traditional pre-wedding events?

8 Comments

Latest activity by Sb, on June 2, 2020 at 11:06 AM
  • K
    Dedicated June 2020
    Kelsey
    • Flag
    We are getting married in June in a small ceremony and then having a larger ceremony and reception in August. My bridal shower and bachelorette will be in late July. No one seems to find anything wrong with this and they are excited to celebrate! It鈥檚 not like you鈥檙e the one hosting your shower/parties 馃槉
    • Reply
  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie
    • Flag

    I wouldn't have those extra parties later (I personally feel that the wedding reception itself is plenty of celebration), but if you have already polled your potential guests and they are fine with it, then I would just let whomever is planning to host those extra parties carry on with their planning (although they have plenty of time before anything needs to be done).

    • Reply
  • Elizabeth
    Super June 2021
    Elizabeth
    • Flag

    I think this is totally fine! We aren't in this position, so I can't speak personally, but I feel like since it's a schedule change due to COVID it's totally fine. I don't think anyone will see it as inappropriate since it isn't really your choice to change everything.

    • Reply
  • Hillary
    Expert October 2021
    Hillary
    • Flag
    We got married on our original date in April but postponed our big wedding twice. First to September and now to October 2021. I was able to have my showers but my bachelorette got cancelled. I do plan on having it at some point since my MOH is super insistent about it (but I also definitely want it). I say you should do whatever you want. Especially if you鈥檝e polled your guests and they鈥檙e all in.
    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn
    • Flag
    As long as everyone knows that you鈥檙e already married, I think it鈥檚 perfectly fine to have these celebrations after the fact, given your situation.
    • Reply
  • Lindsay
    Devoted July 2021
    Lindsay
    • Flag
    Have them!! This is out of anyone鈥檚 control and you shouldn鈥檛 miss out on those special events because of this. I鈥檓 doing the same thing getting legally married in July and having all these events at a later date I too was excited about the events and don鈥檛 feel like we should miss out on them because it was taken away due to no fault of our own everyone will understand times are anything but normal and traditional. Those who love you the most will be excited to celebrate regardless of the timeline.
    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    Super March 2020
    Jennifer
    • Flag
    I would encourage you to still celebrate the way you would like. These situations are not your fault and you shouldn't be asked to not celebrate
    • Reply
  • Sb
    Dedicated October 2020
    Sb
    • Flag

    We are living in very different times, which makes it easier to break "traditions". DO YOU! You deserve to be celebrated.

    • Reply

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