Last name dilemma

Surname conventions are super different in Latin America, so I’m not surprised he’d feel that way if you took his full last name! A compromise (and a tradition in some Latin American cultures, not sure about Mexico specifically) could be to create a new last name for you all using “de”. You would insert “de” in between your paternal last name and his paternal (or maternal, if guys would rather since he isn’t close to his father) last name. For example:

-If your name was Jane Santiago
-His name was John Suarez
-Your married name would be Jane Santiago de Suarez

It might sound awkward if you don’t have a Hispanic last name, however, so you could simply go with “de” + one of his last names (I.e. Jane de Suarez). I actually know a lot of people with this style of last name—I know a de Rouen, de Silva, and a de Leon.

You could also hyphenate your paternal last name with one of his last names (ie Jane Santiago-Suarez). While this would, in most Latin American countries, be the surnaming convention for children of a couple, it’d still be a way to integrate and honor his culture while also making you comfortable with a shared last name.

I will say, from personal experience, that you may well run into issues here in the US with different last names. My cousin, who’s half Puerto Rican, initially didn’t want to change her name as a way to honor her heritage. However, she married a white man, and had children who looked white with him, and started running into all kinds of issues. She eventually had to change her last name to his just because she was tired of it.

You can choose to go with whatever name you prefer, stay with your maiden name, or create a new one altogether. There isn’t a hard rule on what you have to change it to. If your fiancé prefers his mothers last name, you could just use that one instead of his full hyphenated last name. If he feels strongly about you not taking both, he must have some idea of what you should do. I don’t think in the long run it’ll matter to anyone but you two. So many families have mixed last names anymore between choosing to keep maiden names, divorces, remarrying, and children out of wedlock that it doesn’t carry the stigma it did forty or more years ago. Furthermore, you can put your name on whatever accounts of his you want, and your name is not going to affect any of that. It’s not going to change anything as far as paperwork or traveling as long as the information you provide matches your identification. They don’t compare your name to his, just yours to itself to ensure validity. Bottom line is that a name is just a name and you can choose whatever you want.

I would just use the first part of his surname. There won't be any issues as it's still part of his name and lots of people don't change their name at all!

My fh has two last names. His original and his adopted name. I will be taking his adopted name as he is keeping it.

My fiancé is also from Mexico and has two last names. Is he a resident? And if so did he drop one of the names? My fiancé is dropping one and just becoming Garcia when he gets his residency. The two last names is sooooo annoying legally.

Everyone from Mexico legally uses 2 last name paternal and maternal. Women in Mexico can’t change their last name. Socially they might use their husbands last name but it would only be the first one (paternal). My husband is from Mexico and when he became a US citizen he dropped the second name.
If you are planning on taking his name you have to take it how he legally has it in the US. If he is not naturalized you will have to take both last names.
I know because I asked. In the end I just kept my maiden name and socially I use hyphenated.