Skip to main content
ARE YOU A VENDOR?

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

M
Dedicated February 2018

Husband yells at me in his sleep

Michelle, on April 2, 2018 at 9:10 AM Posted in Married Life 0 14
Saved
Reply
Hello, I posted on here about trouble sleeping before. I wanted to follow up I can sleep just fine now when my spouse and I go to bed at the same time (which he hates to do he likes to be tired amd stay up late watching tv) if he is upset with me and we go to bed at seperate times he literally yells in his sleep mostly “goddamnit anxious bee” (insert my name) it wakes me up. He also thrashes a bit. Yesterday I had him help with housework which he hates and I requested we use all the wedding gift cards for household items. He stayed up late watching tv and then got in bed around 1 am (according to my sleep tracker thats when the snoring started) he yelled at me 2-3 times in his sleep, I was able to go right back to sleep yay!! Anyone else deal with this? Is it night terrors or something? Sometimes when we were dating he would sit up and yell accross the room at something not there. That has stopped as far as I can tell. My spouse has untreated ADHD and he claims OCD. I have a mood disorder amd anxiety disorder that I usually treat with lifestyle management (supplements, sleep hygein, stress management, exercse meditation and yoga) but its been really hard to do that since I got married. He likes to do things when I am ready for bed last night at 10 he jad me get out of bed to telt him where dishes go aftrr I told him just to put amything je wasnt sure about on the sink. I end up staying up later than I would have. I do sleep with earplugs in and a sleep mask and it still wakes me up. At least I was able to fall back to sleep! Any who looking for support really. Thanks!

14 Comments

Latest activity by Stacey, on April 3, 2018 at 9:06 AM
  • EngineerInLove
    VIP September 2018
    EngineerInLove ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Not a doctor, but I would say he needs to talk to a therapist about his diagnosed ADHD and why he thinks he has OCD and go from there. A medical professional will be able to give him unbiased advice about dealing with his condition. If you keep telling him what he needs to do, he will likely become bitter at you even though you are right to communicate with him about your needs and how what he's doing impacts you.
    • Reply
  • Heather
    Expert September 2018
    Heather ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My fh talks and yells in his sleep too
    We used to sleep over at each others house when we first started dating and ive heard him.say some funny things. I had problemz sleeping away at first so i would stay up and listen to him talk some words are clear some are mumbles
    Hes never really directly yelled at me specifically tho. He yells at his brother alot and sometimes the dog sometimes he fights with ppl
    Im so used to it if it wakes me up i go back to sleep
    We have a king sized bed, do you have a smaller bed? When we slept in my double it was hard
    If hes moving or kicking i figure hes having a nightmare and i rub his back til he wakes up and is ok
    I got used to the night talking
    • Reply
  • magnolia5
    VIP June 2019
    magnolia5 ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    Night terrors usually occur in children.
    I would have him go to his doctor and see about doing a sleep study for the yelling. That isn't normal.
    • Reply
  • Nikki
    Devoted October 2018
    Nikki ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My FH threatened me one time in his sleep after a night of drinking. He has never and would never hurt me and he wasn't mad at me that night he was just dreaming. But it woke me up and scared the crap out of me so much he stopped drinking for a bit. I would suggest he needs to talk to a therapist or maybe try talking about stuff before you guys go to sleep so he's not going to sleep agitated? Maybe he's bottling things? I'm sorry that sucks!
    • Reply
  • M
    Dedicated February 2018
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    We have a split king but yah I am a light sleeper.
    • Reply
  • M
    Dedicated February 2018
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    He doesnt want to he says I should do a sleep study for being woken up so easily! Haha
    • Reply
  • OG Kathryn
    Champion May 2016
    OG Kathryn ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment

    Well that isnt very supportive. He has a problem. He shouldn't be blaming it on you. He should be concerned its effecting your sleep. Screaming in your sleep is NOT normal.

    • Reply
  • magnolia5
    VIP June 2019
    magnolia5 ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    I'm a heavy sleeper, but I would wake up if someone next to me were yelling. From what you've written, it seems like this is a common occurrence for him. It is not normal.
    Your sleep is being compromised, which can adversely affect your mental health.
    • Reply
  • M
    Dedicated February 2018
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    View Quoted Comment
    I agree, I asked him to ask his doctor about sleep issues before and he didnt want to. He doesnt want to admit that he has a problem at all. My dad has the same problems which is why I tolerate it I guess. My parents sleep in seperate rooms.
    • Reply
  • Rachel
    Dedicated September 2018
    Rachel ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My FH snores loudly and thrashes in his sleep. He also likes staying up late. When he comes to bed, it wakes me up. It doesn’t help that I am a light sleeper. He doesn’t seem to care 😵
    • Reply
  • Priscilla
    Savvy February 2019
    Priscilla ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    This should also be brought up with his general practitioner. He may also have a sleep disorder. My father has an REM sleep cycle disorder and it started with him yelling in his sleep. He has to meet with a neurologist and do multiple sleep studies.

    • Reply
  • Lex
    VIP September 2019
    Lex ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content
    My FH has night terrors. He’s had them all his life, but they didn’t happen very often until his dad died. Now it’s at least once a month, and it scares the poop out of me every time.
    He hasn’t yelled at me though (he has accidentally punched me in the nose) and I think it’s kinda weird that your FH does as often as he does. I’d see a sleep specialist about that, and maybe have some counseling. It wouldn’t hurt to try it and it may find your answer.
    • Reply
  • Stacey
    Super October 2018
    Stacey ·
    • Flag
    • Hide content

    Sounds like he has some emotional issues along with a sleep disorder. My FH used to talk/yell and sleep walk and it would get worse when he was stressed or upset about something. It was also affected by certain medications or alcohol. Regardless of what is going on, the fact that he doesn't seem concerned about how it affects you is worrisome.

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

Shopping for a Husband Who Has Everything? These Are the Best Gifts
Married Life Shopping for a Husband Who Has Everything? These Are the... What do you get for the husband who has everything? That's easy: One of these...
Here's What Your Sleep Position Says About Your Relationship
Lifestyle Here's What Your Sleep Position Says About Your Relationship... To spoon or not to spoon?
I Met My Husband On Tinder—and You Can, Too
Lifestyle I Met My Husband On Tinder—and You Can, Too If you're ready to meet "the one", a dating app is a great place to start.
Read more articles
WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

Show more

WeddingWire article topics