Yuri
Just Said Yes October 2022

How to ask guest for money instead of gifts.

Yuri, on October 12, 2021 at 11:34 AM Posted in Registry 0 14
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Hey everyone,
So my fiance and I ate planning to get married in Mexico. I really don't want to lug the gifts around, so I'm wondering how do I put it kindly that we would rather have monetary gifts toward the honeymoon instead

14 Comments

Latest activity by Emilia, on October 15, 2021 at 5:33 AM
  • Cool
    Super July 2020
    Cool ·
    • Flag
    The short answer, you don’t.


    But really, guests aren’t going to bring a physical gift to your wedding, if anything they would bring a card and check. If you do not create a registry, people will get the hint that you want cash. Depending on your crowd, honeymoon funds and cash funds don’t go over well with most.
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  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
    • Flag

    Don't register. When guests ask you where you are registered/what you would like, let them know that you didn't register but are saving up for your honeymoon.

    • Reply
  • Nisha
    Expert May 2022
    Nisha ·
    • Flag

    Just don't.

    If anything, don't create a registry and hope people just bring cash. There is no proper way to ask for money.

    • Reply
  • W
    Super September 2020
    Willow ·
    • Flag
    "Because we and most of our guests will be traveling for the wedding, we would prefer no physical gifts"
    • Reply
  • Yuri
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Yuri ·
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    Thank you so much Willow. This was along the lines of what I was thinking.
    • Reply
  • Nisha
    Expert May 2022
    Nisha ·
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    Cash is physical. Just say "we prefer no gifts" and those who want to and feel obliged will still give you something. Do not imply that cash is wanted.

    • Reply
  • mrswinteriscoming
    Rockstar December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
    • Flag

    Where I come from, "wishing wells" are quite common and it is quite normal to see invitation suites which include a note on gifts (note: this is in Australia and no one gets offended by this like Americans tend to [based on my own experience on WW]).

    I think this is very much a 'know-your-crowd' type thing. Personally, we included a little poem on having a wishing well which we included in our details card, and this is common in our circles, but, if your guests wouldn't be comfortable with something like that, don't mention gifts or make a registry (though be mindful some guests will still give physical gifts).

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  • Yuri
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Yuri ·
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    Yes this is exactly im saying. My family and most of my guest are not American, so they don't do things like the "traditional American way". Most of them probably don't know what a regristy is, because we are used to just giving money or gifts the day of the wedding, at least in my experience. This was more for insight on how to approach the few who are used to the American way.
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  • Yuri
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Yuri ·
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    Thank you!! 😊
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  • Rosie
    Rockstar February 2022
    Rosie ·
    • Flag

    What about something like 'your presence is the greatest gift we could ask for, and with our travel arrangements, we recognise boxed gifts are likely to be cumbersome! Should you wish to honour us with a contribution to our honeymoon fund however, a wishing well will be available on the day.'

    Of course, like MrsWinterIsComing, I'm Australian and there is no real offense caused as registries are probably less common than wishing wells and honeymoon funds are.

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  • Yuri
    Just Said Yes October 2022
    Yuri ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    This sounds lovely 😍.


    I will definitely be using these wonderful ideas! Thank you 😊
    • Reply
  • Rachel
    Beginner October 2021
    Rachel ·
    • Flag
    Make a HoneyFund!!! Even if people don’t send money through the site they’ll get the idea. There’s a paragraph where you can explain that you’re lucky enough to have everything for your home. My fiancé and I did a honeymoon fund on the site and then a new furniture fund as well.
    • Reply
  • Katie & Josh
    Savvy May 2022
    Katie & Josh ·
    • Flag

    My FH and I already live together, and after combining two complete households into one, we do NOT need more stuff in our home! We are however purchasing a new house together next summer that we will be using all money we receive from the wedding towards. We did register, but for very little - about 30 items total - as we know most people who will be attending the shower will bring a physical gift. We told our parents and bridal party to let our family and friends know that we want cash to purchase our home instead of receiving household gifts. We put on our website "All monetary gifts will be used for the payment and improvement of the first home we will purchase together in the summer of 2022." We plan to throw a housewarming party after we purchase and invite all the people who contributed as an additional "thank you."

    I would suggest to tell your parents, siblings, and bridal party to let others know you just want cash. They will understand and are close enough to you that they probably won't see it as rude. Then they can be the ones to nudge your guests to give cash without it coming across as you directly asking for money from them.

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  • Emilia
    Expert June 2019
    Emilia ·
    • Flag

    Hi ! A HoneyFound would be a great idea. Here in France there are no wedding lists or registers any more... People usually get married at their 30, 40s, having already kids and homes... they don't want any gifts, they want money Smiley xd . So there are some founds online, even PayPal.

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