Hosting Bridal Shower, all No’s so far. Help!

Usually showers rsvps are regrets only . But since people are starting to get into the trend of a full meal rather than appetizers and desserts, then you can follow up on replies the same as you would with wedding rsvps: wait till the day after the due date to contact people.


Otherwise just have fun with whomever shows up.

I wouldn’t change the date. More than just timing can go into a “no” response , so a date change isn’t an automatic fix. And anyway, no date will work for every single guest, it’s just statistically rare. I’d just hope for some yeses and plan to make the most out of the small crew you have. A small shower can be LOVELY. I had a teeny tiny one thrown for me and it was really amazing. There were good snacks, good drinks, good games, and good company. It was probably 12-15 guests I think. For a quick second before it started (but after I’d heard the guest count) I felt a teeny bit sad but then I realized who all came and it was perfect, and the very best part was I got in some VERY quality time with some very special people, which was really a fantastic opportunity that I appreciated very much. Small is not bad !

Also to clarify, my first point, one reason a person may decline a shower is bc they don’t want to or can’t spend on an extra gift, and it’s a gift giving event. So, I would be hesitant to reach out and see if another date was better in case that puts them on the spot or makes them feel obligated to come. I’ve also turned down showers because : they were inconvenient (or costly) to get to; because my mom wasn’t going and im not that close with that side of the family; because I wouldn’t know anyone at all, etc. ...if one of those hosts had reached out to me to change the date on my behalf I would’ve felt a little awkward and maybe pushed into going even though I really didn’t want to. Currently, I think you might still get some no’s for a mixed crowd event due to covid (I’m happy to attend events with my crew who I know are careful and or vaccinated, but not necessarily up for group events where I don’t know everyone’s situation !).


As an alternative solution, I think it’s not too late to add additional guests, if there’s anyone else you’d want to invite/ the bride would want included. But again don’t stress it, because small parties can still be amazing parties.

View Quoted Comment Thank you for taking the time to reply. I completely agree that not every date will work for everyone, and having a smaller shower myself I absolutely loved the intimacy of it.


I feel that my concern is what if only 3 or less people rsvp yes? Would I host a full blown bridal shower for just three people? The likely hood of this happening I hope is slim, I think I want to just prepare for worst case scenario.
Thank you again for your time

View Quoted Comment Ahhh yes, that makes sense and believe me when I say the last thing I want to do is put anyone on the spot or make anyone feel uncomfortable! Especially since I don’t know most of the woman.


Thank you again for your advice

View Quoted Comment

This is a difficult situation. Putting myself in the bride's shoes, I think I'd feel a little sad if only 3 out of 20 guests showed up to my bridal shower. I personally would just cancel it. Depending on the guests, perhaps you could skip the shower and just go out for brunch? Someone above mentioned that a small shower can be a lovely event, and I totally agree! But 12 is a MUCH different number than 3-5. Certainly a touch situation!

View Quoted Comment Maybe reach out to them one more time and be like I’m not sure if you did or didn’t get my RSVP for the Bridal Shower but I’m trying to do the head count💁🏽‍♀️And that will tell you if you wanna still have one. Peoples are a trip. Support when and who they want too.

View Quoted Comment Yeah I still have plenty of time regarding RSVP’s. Someone else mentioned to change it to a brunch or dining out type of deal and that would work. I just feel bad and want the bride to have fun.

View Quoted Comment Thank you, brunch is a really good idea. Of course I hope it doesn’t come to this and I hope I’m just overthinking it 😅

View Quoted Comment Yes a brunch sounds good. And I understand I had a baby shower for my MOH only 5 peoples showed up that’s including me and her. I went all out, I was more pissed then her because it was a Surprise but Hope it all works out for the best

For my shower, around 20 we're invited and only 12 showed up. I was kind of sad leading up to the day since almost half the guests declined but it was amazing! As the bride, it seemed like a lot more people since I kept moving around to talk to different people.
My MOH had the most wonderful idea of asking everyone who couldn't come to create a short video for me and she combined them all and surprised me at the shower. I was so surprised and cried like a baby seeing everyone who couldn't come 😂

I recently went to a shower with maybe 10 girls and it was a blast. The hosts still had fun games and cocktails/eats. If it ends up being only a few girls then maybe you can switch up the plans and do a more intimate event like wine tasting or a spa day or cocktails at a swanky restaurant?

It is fine to say, we chose a date when so many have a conflict that we are planning to reschedule it. 😊 Remember that this is not a high society party, it is friends and family, where the etiquette is relaxed, and the point is to have a nice party for her, after all your work. An etiquette mistake would be anything mean or selfish. Nothing here.

From years back in hospital schedules- the first two whole weeks of July are worse than Christmas, Thanksgiving, Labor Day. Thee most requested vacation time all year and the next two of July are high up there. Plus all those pesky weddings. And no one interrupts a vacation for a shower. Would a date change help? You have enough for a small shower, but you also may he disappointing people who want to go, with this many declines this far out. And after hadt year, people can finally travel. They won't cancel for a shower. When is the wedding?

A “handful” of people is still enough for a bridal shower. So there’s no need to change the date. Either people can come or they can’t (that’s how life works). But you’ll be chasing dates forever trying to get one that works for the majority. So stick with the date you have. Plus there’s still a long time left for others to RSVP