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I was thinking of just having a brunch as a meet and greet for the ladies that are coming to the wedding, I don’t think it’s fair to miss the experience of a shower as you’re only a bride once!
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I think having a brunch in lieu of a wedding shower would be a lovely idea. A wedding shower is strictly a giftgiving event (hence the name wedding shower, which means to shower the bride with gifts). If you would prefer a non-giftgiving event, hosting a brunch would be perfect!
A brunch that you host in honor of your bridal party and close relatives is not a shower and should not be described or referred to that way. It is to thank your guests and in honor of them, not you. I would never expect or agree to a shower, which by definition is about gifts, if you are set on a DW.
Are you hosting it yourself? Usually someone else hosts the shower anyway so it comes across as less gift-grabby. The reason they’re less common for destination weddings is because there’s less pressure on the guests to give a gift for a DW (your presence is the present!), so even the assumption that guests will split the cost of their gift between the shower and the wedding doesn’t really work out there where no gift is acceptable. But if a relative or friend throws you a shower anyway, which is how it usually works, you’re not hosting and didn’t ask for it, so enjoy it anyway. If you want to host a ladies brunch that’s just about the company, then do that. To answer your question, I’m quasi-DW (local to a destination wedding venue that for all intents and purposes is destination for our guests), and I’m not not doing any of the extras but will be spending the morning of the wedding with my MOH having a nice breakfast and getting manicures (paid for by me), so I’ll be getting some chill girl time in then. The welcome party will be an opportunity for our guests to get to know each other, and we’ve come up with a little trivia game to play throughout the evening to help them do so.