Bridal shower help

Generally yes, if you invite people for a party it is typically expected that you (as the host) would pay.

I wonder if you would be better off with hiring a town hall and providing a buffet or afternoon tea? (which could be affordably sourced from shops)

I would reach out to the grooms mother and see if she would being willing to cohost with you. Explain your situation to her – your mother passed away and you are trying to help fill that gap in your sisters life, but you are feeling overwhelmed and in over your head. And since the majority of the guests are her family, you want to make sure they have a good time and are properly hosted.

I like Bridget’s idea of the hall! Hosting it at a non-meal time will set the expectation a meal would not be provided maybe a good idea (2:00pm). I like Bridget’s idea of an afternoon tea perhaps serving coffee, cookies, cake, and apps I think would be so fun!

I like all the posters' ideas above. Also, only wedding guests should be invited to the bridal shower. It would be rude to invite someone to the small party, but not the big one. Therefore, the MIL should respect the guest list of the bride and groom. If they haven't created a list, then you also don't have your shower budget. Host within your means or ask the other side to co-host.

If you host the shower during a non-meal time, you could absolutely just do beverages and and appetizers/desserts! I also agree with Bridget's idea of hosting it at a town hall or somewhere inexpensive, and bringing in a cake and snacks. As for the guest list, get the list of people that her future in-laws want to invite and run it by your sister. If there is anyone on that list who isn't being invited to the wedding, then they shouldn't be invited to the bridal shower.

If the in-laws aren’t hosting, they’re not determining the guest list. If they want an event with everyone invited, they can host it! So my best advice is be sure to stand up for yourself and ask for help. I would come up with a plan that is within your means, share the details of that, and they can either help you out to their liking, or they can host their own event. Open and honest communication should go a long way here, if they’re reasonable people.

Did you consider doing a Airbnb whT was you thinking about doing also how many ppl is the laws excepting to come. A bridal shower is for the ladies and since you said that the budget isn't that big ask the in law's to chip in,but I also know that sometimes they want to take over. Think about what you can afford and maybe ask friends and family to pitch in with cooking etc. I hope that everything works out for you for your sister

Like Mcskipper suggests, the FMIL should host the bridal shower if determining the people to be there. If there is no practical way for you to host such the shower with many people, it is not upon you to step beyond your means.

You're not obligated to host and pay for a huge shower. As others have suggested, I would reach out to her FMIL for help with hosting.

"I have $200 in my budget to host this shower, and I will need to stay within that. Would you like to help me host and cover the costs of the event? Otherwise I will be needing to limit the guest list to X amount of people. I was thinking an afternoon party...."

Good luck with your planning!

View Quoted Comment Future mil wants to have at least 50 on her side alone (including kids). They are all going to be at the reception, but I was hoping to keep it to the women invited the actual ceremony (about 20 total)

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It's OK to just tell her that. "I need to keep the guest count to about 20". If she balks, you could suggest that she host a separate shower for her family.

The bridal shower is usually hosted by the maid of honor, close friends, bridal attendants, or bridesmaids. No matter who is hosting, be sure to communicate clearly to make sure you aren't planning two separate showers.

Are the bridesmaids helping you host this? Typically, bridal showers are hosted by the wedding party, not by the sister or MIL.

I would look for a small party room or church that would rent you a small space. I would have it at 2 and just serve desert type items.

What is the appropriate amount of money to give for a bridal shower?around $50-$75The standard amount to spend on a bridal shower gift is around $50-$75. If you're invited to a bridal shower but not particularly close with the bride , expect to spend at least $25. Regular friends, co-workers, or distant family members should consider spending up to $75 if they have the budget to spare