Bachelorette party/destination trip

That is beyond excessive. Don’t feel bad having to decline. When people choose to have expensive, time-consuming destination bachelorette trips, they do so knowing that it is a lot to ask of others, and it may mean a high decline rate for their event.

I mean yes it would probably be a very fun time but the bride has to understand if people can't make a trip like that. Being a part of this bridal party could easily cost someone over 2k if they attend the Bach. party. I wouldnt feel guilty about not being able to attend this, thats a lot to ask of someone. Is the bride paying her own way or are the guests expected to pay for her?

View Quoted Comment She’s paying her own way, but we are expected to pay for the other activities planned. They are planning on booking a boat/yacht day trip with food and drinks as well.

"I'm so sorry, that is just way beyond my means right now and not a commitment I can make given all of the uncertainty in this economy. However, I would love to find a night together and celebrate locally before you get married!"

I apologize for the length of this article, but hopefully it will show you're not alone regarding finances and bachelorette parties. I'm sorry you've been put in such a position.


https://finance.yahoo.com/news/1-000-flight-600-balloon-162548180.html

That is excessive. Budgets and feasibility for everyone involved needs to be addressed before plans are set in stone. If even one person has an issue being able to make it happen due to money and time availability, then new less expensive/extravagant plans need to be made asap. Tell the bride immediately that this is not feasible for anyone on the guest list. If she doesn’t want to change plans, then none of the bridesmaids attend.

View Quoted Comment I thought it was excessive as well… I messaged the bride privately and basically what I was told by her “I gave MOH ideas of where I wanted to stay and certain requirements. I’m not planning it though so it’s out of my hands” not the greatest response lol. But it’s HER bachelorette trip not the MOH’s?! We very BRIEFLY talked about budgeting, I always said the cheaper the better and one said around $1000 give or take some momey. But they also want to plan daily activities and excursions?! Crazy.

I d call the MOH and say I m so sorry I can't attend this event but I hope you all have fun and call it a day. I think its fairly normal for a bridesmaid or MOH to plan the trip but my guess is she s planning what the bride has requested. This is going to turn into a huge vacation rather than a bachelorette party.

View Quoted Comment Let them know asap you can’t attend. Don’t say anything beyond that because they are not respecting anyone’s time or finances. It doesn’t matter who is hosting the party because the bride or the maid of honor or both could have easily shut it down and said it was expensive or at an inconvenient time for everyone to attend. Because they chose not to, they are making all of you out to be the bad guys for not participating in something you never agreed to.

View Quoted Comment OK, I definitely would not take this advice. This is skewing incredibly petty to organize a “boycott” on your friend’s bachelorette party. I would just have an honest heart-to-heart with her letting her know that you (I would not bring up the financial situation of anyone else on the guest list- that is their private business, and their choice whether to have that conversation with the bride) cannot afford the trip right now. Let her know that you are disappointed you can’t make it, but can’t wait to see pictures and hear all about it! And if you really want to celebrate with her beforehand, maybe all you girls could get together for a casual dinner and/or drinks some evening.

Skip the trip and let them know asap. This is way too pricy

So since she didn't speak to anyone I think that was in is impulsive to go to the Caribbean. All thought that would be amazing but she should spoken to her wedding party first had a meeting or a group chat. To discuss these things about cost and dates.

It’s pretty rude she didn’t ask anyone their budget. Honestly I would just let her know you can’t attend. This is exactly why I’m not doing one. I can’t imagine asking my friends to spend this kind of money one a trip for me

I'd just say that you won't be able to attend, unfortunately. Don't give reasons or explain things, because people will try to "solve" the problem for you. You're well within your right to decline.

The bride/MOH should have asked about budgets before planning this.

Don't feel bad declining! I would simply say that you wont be attending but you'd love to plan a night to celebrate her when you get back! My bach is $600 PP and I made it VERY clear that it was optional. 3 of my 6 privately messaged me and said they really wanted to go but were scared to commit. I started a fund of my own money to help them pay. If it was that important to your bride, she would do the same!