Bachelor/ette Party Help

"I need to know by *Insert Date* if you are all able to make the cruise since I need to plan and book the stay. If you do not respond by *insert date*, then I will assume you cannot make it. If you need more time to figure things out, please message me privately. I am so excited to spend this time with you all!"

Or something along those lines

I agree with this advice. This is the risk with planning a destination party yourselves. People want to please you and not say, "no", so they act very excited up front, but then show hesitation (but are afraid to tell you) when it comes time to pay actual money/request time away from work/organize childcare/whatever. All you can do at this point is give them a firm deadline and then accept any non-responses by that deadline as "no".

Like any other event...you set a deadline for a response prior to booking any travel. If you don't get a response, you can call for a yes/no or just book those who have responded.

Don't put too much stress on yourself or them. Attending is optional, just set a firm RSPV date before you buy any tickets.

If this were me, I wouldn't leave it up to my maid of honor - if she's too busy to help you plan it and can't give a definite "yes/no". Remember that it's *yours* and *your partner's* engagement and eventual celebration for getting married. I agree that you should put a deadline for an "RSVP" initially, but if it doesn't pan out - I would just opt for an alternative that suits yours and your partner's convenience to celebrate with those who you wanted to be there at this "cruise" in the first place on a different date.

Should you get a lackluster response from the majority of your wedding party about January's cruise, I would opt for a holiday weekend in January or February that people can *choose to attend* and set a firm deadline. I totally get everyone has their own schedule, but they've had ample time to think about it and it sucks because you can tell this isn't a priority for them months ahead of time. Overall, it just feels like a "no" and it's not fair of you to throw in money that could go to waste and throw in the added stress.

So you need to decide for the sake of both you and your partners' sanity - whether or not this is something you two *WANT* to worry about. It can already be stressful for you both to accommodate people for your upcoming nuptials/wedding. Put your energy in something you can make mandatory to attend, since you're not getting the responses you need right now - be that a camping trip or something else recreational - like a weekend road trip, where other people are in charge of showing up and driving themselves. Life is crazy enough that you have to make a celebration about you to be about everyone else. They wouldn't be in your wedding party if you didn't respect and love them, but you've got your stuff to think of too. There's nothing wrong with starting over with an alternative that makes *you* happy.

Hope this helps! x