Erika
Savvy October 2019

Bachelorette Party Blues

Erika, on February 15, 2019 at 8:53 PM Posted in Parties and Events 0 16
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Hi all! So I got engaged on this past Thanksgiving and picked my bridal party on February 2. They asked me what I wanted to do for my bachelorette party and I told them if they’re willing to come I wanted to do a destination bachelorette party, preferably to Las Vegas. They were all down but then when I started finding hotels/air bnbs/ flights everyone started singing a different tune. One bridesmaid is engaged as well but has no date, venue, nothing. I told the group I wanted to do the bachelorette party in September being as though I’m getting married October 19, she told me that she is looking to get married this September and may be on her honeymoon. So I changed it to August one bridesmaid tells me today that she cant go because that’s her mom and sisters birthday and she may be going on a trip with them, man of honor is excited to go, 1 other bridesmaid is saying she will go, and other bridesmaid has a total of 5 kids and just had twins and saying she wont be able to find a baby sitter until Friday and we were going from Thursday-Monday so she says it’ll be a waist for her to go because she cant come out until that Saturday , and the last bridesmaid isn’t even responding to the group text messages. I am starting to feel like no one gives a damn about me and this wedding. Please tell me if I’m being selfish or not? I’m gonna sleep on it and think about it over the weekend but I’m thinking about cancelling the trip and just doing a weekend thing here in DC where we live.

16 Comments

  • Megan
    Super May 2019
    Megan ·
    A lot of people on here are going to tell you that you shouldn’t be planning your own bachelorette party. Even still you won’t be able to accommodate everyone so I suggest finding a weekend most are available and asking a budget they are comfortable with
  • Erika
    Savvy October 2019
    Erika ·
    View Quoted Comment

    I figured, but I am a planner naturally. I was planning where we go, how we get there, and where we stay because I can get it at a good rate, however, they were going to plan everything we do once we're there.

  • Maggie
    Super February 2019
    Maggie ·
    Sorry you are feeling that way. Its frustrating they aren't on board, but a trip to Vegas is a huge commitment and one that a lot of people can't afford (even if they wanted to). It may also be hard for people to admit that, so maybe that's why they've been ignoring you. I would plan something local, maybe get an Airbnb someplace close by for a weekend and just hang out. It doesn't have to be extravagant to be fun.
  • Erika
    Savvy October 2019
    Erika ·

    Whats crazy is they were the ones pushing a destination bacherolette party but I think you're right. I think I'm just gonna let them plan something locally over a weekend.

  • Maggie
    Super February 2019
    Maggie ·
    View Quoted Comment
    They probably were totally into it when it was still just an idea, but once it became a reality and they had to figure out sitters, budget, etc along with picking a date it probably just got to be too much. I've talked about taking long trips with friends and we're all for it until it comes time to actually plan. I think its rare to actually pull off a trip like this, but I totally get the disappointment.
  • Colleen
    Master September 2019
    Colleen ·
    I am sorry you feel let down. A trip to Vegas is pretty big. Can you maybe do a trip that is closer and less expensive?
  • Erika
    Savvy October 2019
    Erika ·

    Yea, I think I'm going to tell everyone that we can just do something in the area in which we live. It's a lot to do here in Washington DC.

  • L
    Expert June 2019
    Lori ·
    I can understand what your going through, I thought my bridal party would be a lot more excited and happy for me.
  • Erika
    Savvy October 2019
    Erika ·
    View Quoted Comment
    It’s sucks right! I know if we do something locally they’ll all be on board. I hope it works out with you and your bridesmaids
  • Dee
    Dedicated June 2019
    Dee ·
    I planned my own bachelorette party to Vegas .
    were my bridesmaids mad that I took the fun away from them? Yeah but I don’t care , I got things planned and booked within a matter of days. Is everybody going? No. But I’m ok with that. It is what it is.

    If they really wanted to go, they will find a way. If not , whatever with the people who can go and have a blast. This is about you
  • Erika
    Savvy October 2019
    Erika ·

    That’s what my fiancé says, go with the friends and bridesmaids that can go...from the looks of it only 2 will go out of the 5. He says oh well...have fun with them, you only get married once. He’s also going with maybe 1 or 2 of his groomsmen so we may just combine the entire thing and it may be a total of no more than 10 people total.

  • Yoice
    VIP March 2019
    Yoice ·
    It is hard for destination bachelorette party because not everyone is able to afford or the dates might not work for them. You shouldn’t feel bad about that but you need to understand is possible. I’m having a destination wedding so I know my bridal party was having an expense with the wedding alone so I gave the planning to my bridal party so they could plan whatever they were able to afford and surprise me with it. I ended up having a destination bachelorette party from Friday thru Sunday and it worked out just fine with just 4 girls and myself. Sometimes you don’t need much to enjoy and you don’t need that many days either because although flights are cheaper those days you’re paying for an extra or 2 extra days of accommodation, excursions & food.
    Everything is very reason so give yourself more time and first ask them what their budget is to work around it. You don’t have to stay local you can go to another nearby city that might cost less and be more convenient for everyone.
    Just a thought.
  • L
    Expert June 2019
    Lori ·
    View Quoted Comment
    It does, not how I imagined it.... I'm glad you can do something locally, have fun!!!!
  • Colleen
    Master September 2019
    Colleen ·
    View Quoted Comment
    I hate that saying. I can’t snap and make money grow from a tree I can’t say it’s ok I can get fired for not showing up to work. I do not need a job. Please realize that people can’t just go,
  • Caytlyn
    Champion November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    You don’t think anyone cares about you or your wedding because they have valid excuses to not travel for a destination party that you’re throwing yourself...yes, you’re definitely being selfish.
  • L
    Savvy March 2020
    Lauren ·
    I would just go and celebrate with the people who can come. A destination bachelor party can be expensive especially for people who have families. I live in DC too, there’s a lot of fun things you all can do here but if you’re set on going away then go with the group that’s available.

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