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Mrs._S
Expert April 2018

Is there a cut off age for the ring bearer and flower girl?

Mrs._S, on April 12, 2016 at 10:34 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 24

Wasn't sure if this was asked just yet? I know of two young girls to be flower girls that are sisters but when my FH and I get married the oldest will be 12.

24 Comments

Latest activity by Mrs._S, on August 1, 2016 at 11:41 AM
  • Sept2017AKBride
    VIP September 2017
    Sept2017AKBride ·
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    12 is a little old in my opinion. A pre-teen would probably be more comfortable being a Jr. Bridesmaid.

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  • Kristy
    Master November 2015
    Kristy ·
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    I don't think its too old. Ask them. Its only too old if they feel too old for it Smiley smile

    I mean... flower girl, jr bridesmaid.... they're just labels. No one will really know exactly what their label is. Just see what they are comfortable with. They don't have to throw petals if it feels too childish, they can hold mini bouquets or something Smiley smile

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  • lulu1180
    Super June 2016
    lulu1180 ·
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    My 12 year old niece is a Jr BM in my wedding

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  • Patrick Lopez
    Patrick Lopez ·
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    If you're going with kids who are on the older side it might be a good idea to try to come up with a creative way to upgrade the role for them. A few months back I saw something where the ring bearer role was turned into "ring security" for a boy who was about 9 or 10 years old. They gave him an earpiece and sunglasses for a secret service look.

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  • FutureKL
    VIP September 2017
    FutureKL ·
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    I think at 12 I would have felt really awkward as a flower girl. I'd keep it under 10 myself for sure, maybe even 8.

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  • MrsPettit
    Super May 2016
    MrsPettit ·
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    I don't think the age matters much at all, because the line between Jr. Bridesmaid and Flower Girl can be pretty thin. Our flower girl is on the older side, she's wearing a dress to match the bridesmaids and is carrying a bouquet rather than petals. Like @Kristy mentioned -- at some point it's all semantics.

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  • Marleen P
    Super May 2017
    Marleen P ·
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    My niece is 12 now, she will be a jr bridesmaid. She is very excited because in her words, "now I can wear women clothing"... lol

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  • Jacky
    Master June 2017
    Jacky ·
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    I was a flower girl in my cousins wedding in '99 when I was 13, along with my other cousin who was 11. We wore these little purple sundresses and walked with a bouquet of flowers, so we didn't drop petals. We were kinda like in between flower girls and jr bridesmaids, just cause we felt like the bridesmaids. My nephew who is also 13, is pretty much the designated ring bearer for everyone's wedding, including mine, lol. He doesn't care. He likes standing up. He carries the rings in his pocket and stands with the groomsmen, so it's pretty age appropriate. Yeah, it would definitely workSmiley smile

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  • Private User
    VIP August 2014
    Private User ·
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    1. You don't have to have a flower girl and ring bearer

    2. You don't have to have both girls participate

    3. There is no age cut-off

    http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/offbeat/woman-invites-her-95-year-old-grandmother-to-be-the-flower-girl-at-her-wedding/ar-BBr5UrA?li=BBnbfcL

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  • Lauren17
    Master July 2017
    Lauren17 ·
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    Generally they are usually younger. 12 would be junior bridesmaid in my opinion.

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  • Mrs. Knolle
    Master July 2016
    Mrs. Knolle ·
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    I would say under 10. 10 and up I would say would be JR. BM territory.

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  • ChocolatierKT
    VIP September 2016
    ChocolatierKT ·
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    There is no limit. My flower girls will be 9 and 14. Our Jr BMs will be 16 and 14

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  • Jen D.
    VIP May 2017
    Jen D. ·
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    My cousin was 10 when she was a flower girl in our other cousin's wedding. Since she'll be 14 for mine, I asked her to be a Jr BM. But honestly, it's your wedding. If the girls are happy being FGs then cool.

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  • Natalie
    Master September 2016
    Natalie ·
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    My flower girl is 8.

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  • Jenny
    VIP December 2016
    Jenny ·
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    I thought my kids were too old (daughter will be 17 and son 14 at the wedding) and was looking for ways to incorporate them without doing "little kid stuff", but they both want to be ring bearers! OK! Smiley smile

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  • Kira
    Super March 2017
    Kira ·
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    It all depends. My junior bridesmaid is going to be 10 at my wedding. I originally wanted her to be my flower girl, but she is already almost 5 feet and found it to be hard finding a flower girl dress for her. Just choose what feels right to you.

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  • FutureMrsW
    Expert December 2016
    FutureMrsW ·
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    I say do that YOU want!

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  • Andrea&John's Day
    Dedicated January 2017
    Andrea&John's Day ·
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    My Jr Bride will be 10, Jr bm, 9, Fg, 8, and Rb, 6... they are 4 of my grand babies!

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  • Katie
    Savvy August 2016
    Katie ·
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    We're having our grandmothers be flower girls, so it's more about what you're wanting and how comfortable they will feel

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  • Kimi
    Master August 2016
    Kimi ·
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    Yes, there is a cutoff and the wedding police will arrest you if you go over it.

    All kidding aside, it's what the members of your BP feel comfortable doing. Chronological age doesn't always mean maturity and ability to handle situations.

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