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Too Soon to Ask?

Hi everyone. I have been engaged for about 2 months now but our wedding isn't for another year and 9 months... I'm not a very patient person and want to ask my bridemaids to be in my wedding but I'm worried that I'm starting the planning process too soon. Can anyone suggest a timeline for engagments longer than one year?

Posted On: Nov 5, 2009 at 12:37 PM

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SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

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reddiva22

Wedding: [Private]

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:40 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I don't think its too early to ask ppl to be in your wedding. I think you should start thinking about what type of theme you may want or what type of colors you want. Also what type of a venue you may want for ur reception, Good luck!:)

Mrs. Sarah Halliwell

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 10

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:42 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
if you woud like to ask them now i dont see a problem with it. its an exciting time! i was engaged for 18 months so your would be just a bit longer than that til your wedding. why not start with making your budget out and you can start to look for venues and churches in maybe january? then after i did those three things i took care of all the big stuff right away. i found a florist and phtogrherss atc by the end of the summer of 2008 (got engaged in april 2008). im glad i did alot of big things right away so i could relax and take time with some ofthe smaller stuff. i ws basically done everything by june 2009 so i could then enjoy my summer then got married in october and did all the last minute stuff in september. hope that kind of helps!

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:42 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Thanks, I just always hear of people suggesting to wait.... we've already booked our location and it's going to be a summer wedding (August) so I'm thinking a yellow color theme... not sure yet...if I had BM's they could help me with these things! I was thinking 6 BM's is that too many or too little? We'll probably have approx. 225 guests

Amanda F.

Wedding: 10/23/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:43 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I asked my bridesmaids right away even though the wedding was more than a year away. I am booking the ceremony and reception sites now, but I am not going to worry about the rest (cake, dress, flowers etc) until 6 months before.

Traci_Bob

Wedding: 06/12/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:43 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
If you are real close with them and know for sure you want these people to stand by you, then ask away :)

Mrs. Sarah Halliwell

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 10

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:44 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
i think you shouldhave as many as you like. y freind is having 6 in june and her wedding is 140.

sweet_firefly

Married: 11/14/2009
Reviews: 8

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:44 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I don't think it's too early to ask. I asked my bridesmaids over a year and a half out. That being said, a lot of things change in that much time. You may decide later on that you want a smaller wedding party (big if, but worth the consideration). I would say, if you can wait, do it. Ask them about a year out. They don't need to order their dresses until 4-6 months out (and even that is a very generous estimate). You could take this time to plan a special way to ask them!

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:50 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
That's true... I would like to ask them in a unique way... any suggsetions for that? Also, my best friend is getting married next Friday in Mexico but she is also having a local reception during the first week of December so I was thinking I might wait to ask her to be my MOH after her wedding is all done with...maybe in January after the holidays?

Leapoffaith

Wedding: 10/02/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:52 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
The timeline is really up to you. It is your wedding and you can do whatever you think is best! It's never too early to ask. I am a procrastinator. I got engaged last Thanksgiving. My wedding's in October, 2010. I just asked my best friend to be my MoH today. (I was nervous for some reason :o) All I've done for my wedding so far is book the church and the reception hall. If it wasn't for my friends and family pushing me to plan this wedding, I don't know when I'd start!

Bayridgeqt

Wedding: 07/02/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:56 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I actually took an idea from someone who posted on the wedding bee. I created a collage of pictures of me and my fiance, and a bunch of meaningful things to us and sent it to a company that made it into a puzzle...when they put the puzzle together it asked them to be in our bridal party. Here's how my puzzle came out http://photos-f.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs156.snc1/5815_124997577604_560622604_2443298_3636515_n.jpg (I'd have to look for the puzzle site if you were interested). Then I went onto snap fish and made them each a little picture card of me and each of them with a personalized poem for them.

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:00 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
That is such a cute idea! I love it...... I found some poems on different sites that I like and I was thinking about using a different one for each girl. I really like the puzzle idea

Tracey

Wedding: 05/22/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:07 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
My wedding is also a long way off but I'm asking my bridesmaids now! That way, they can also plan their time and budget to make sure they can be the best bridesmaids ever!!! :) I'm standing up in my best friend's wedding about 7 months before mine and I just am so excited that we get to go through the wedding planning process together!

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:09 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Okay it's comforting to know other brides are asking their girls now. I've never done this before, ha haa so I don't want to screw it up! LOL. I think I'll prob. ask my girls after the holidays... I'm just so excited and want to ask them soon. I've heard lots of different suggestions on exactly HOW to ask the girls, are you asking yours individually or as a group?

reddiva22

Wedding: [Private]

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:10 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I asked mine individually

Tracey

Wedding: 05/22/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:13 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Well, my sister already knows that she's the MOH and she lives out of state ... I'm asking the other 3 all at once. We're going to dinner as a group with all our guys on Nov. 21 and I'm going to give them each cards and a little gift that asks them to be my bridesmaid. I can't wait! http://www.greetingcarduniverse.com Has great cards if you want to go that route ...

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:16 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Hmmm, I kind of like that idea, to ask them all at dinner. I was thinking about maybe making cards with pictures of me and each girl on them at walgreens.com or something that says on the front "We've shared a lot together..." and then on the inside ask them to share my wedding day with me.... ?

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:18 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Okay, here's one more question.... my FSIL already knows she'll be in the wedding but I haven't really officially asked her. She is about 6 years younger than me (I'm 25, she's 18, almost 19)and we don't know each other too well but I like her a lot and am excited to have her as a SIL so I kind of want to make it special but not too mushy if that makes sense...

Married: 10/17/2009

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:30 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I would advise on making sure that your bms are dependable, supportive, reliable and have the time, money, and enthusiasm to invest in your wedding. Other than that, plan away!

Tracey

Wedding: 05/22/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 2:39 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
You should take your FSIL out just the two of you and ask her. Take her to lunch, or to a movie (Twilight?!?) or soemthing else she'd like. Without being too mushy, you can explain how much it means that she stand up and how excited you are to be family.

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 2:45 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Thanks! I love that idea. She's obsessed with Twilight, ha haa so maybe we could go see the new one together or go get our nails done together. :o) Thanks!

3.6.10Bride

Wedding: 03/06/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 2:49 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Personally, I would wait a little while. I'm the kind of person who changes her mind on everything, so asking someone that far out would be a huge thing for me. I've only been engaged since the end of June, and am getting married in March and have changed my mind about a ton of things in the past few months. That said, you know yourself best. If you're the kind of person who makes a plan and then sticks with it (like my fiance), then it might not be too early.

future Mrs. Gamble

Wedding: 07/04/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 2:53 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
oh congrats!! first of all. second it's never too soon to start planning. trust me it's better to be a head by 9 months then behind 9 months. and it couldn't hurt to ask them now it will give them time to free the schedule and make sure that they can actually be there and help out and all that good stuff. and in case they say yes and then back out it gives you time to find new ones as well. OH CONGRATS again!! and don't worry about being ahead. you'll love that you are when it's closer to time and all you have to do is relax and have fun.

SoExcited!

Wedding: 08/20/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 3:10 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Thank you so much for all of your input girls! I'm new to this site (I just joined today actually) and it's already been great to have some support from other future brides! I read on a different forum about problems that have been going on but I'm glad I joined and look forward to more tips from the "pros". :)

future Mrs. Gamble

Wedding: 07/04/2010

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 3:14 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
so excited you'll fit in here wonderfully! we're glad to have another family member added today! don't forget to upload pics and enjoy your planning. don't get over stressed you have time. if you need us we're always here for you

beckyboo

Wedding: 08/11/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 3:26 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I got engaged last year and I asked my girls right away! and our dates are very close! A week and two days apart! :D Congrats!!

Tracey

Wedding: 05/22/2011

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 3:37 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Yeah, I figured ... everyone is obsessed with Twilight. Myself included. Although I was kind of embarassed when I went to buy one of the books and they led me to the young adult section. LOL

Marcelle

Wedding: 06/25/2010

Posted On: Nov 07, 2009 at 2:46 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
If there are folks that you know FOR SURE that you'll want to be in your wedding 1 year and 9 months from now, then sure. Otherwise, I would wait a few more months. I understand about being antsy to get things going, but you must be really, realy sure about who you want in your wedding.

Laura K.

Married: 05/15/2009
Reviews: 7

Posted On: Nov 07, 2009 at 2:50 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I say wait....I see girls on here all the time who asked their BMs early because they were so excited and then later the regretted it. Once you ask them you can't un-ask so why not wait a bit? I think just like with most of the planning and booking for a wedding, it's a good rule of thumb to start at the one year mark. But I love the idea of asking them in a meaningful way!

Teamch2010

Wedding: 07/31/2010

Posted On: Nov 07, 2009 at 2:52 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
From personal experience, I would wait. One of my bridesmaids (after I had already asked her) enlisted in the Air Force and will not be here during the wedding now. So it's just best to wait in my opinion.

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