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Sally
Super October 2014

Tip jar or no tip jar for bartenders at open bar?

Sally, on July 30, 2014 at 11:37 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 38

If we are doing an open bar, would it be alright to let the bartenders set up a tip jar? My venue is giving me the option to do that or not (they are providing the bartenders). I've been tending bar (in the past, full-time, now just on the side for extra cash) for 8 years now so I have a soft spot for anyone in the service industry. FH and I will of course tip them (and the servers) for everyone on top of their gratuity but I know they'd make more $$ if I let them put out a tip jar. Amongst my friend and family circle most of us have worked in the service industry (how I met a lot of my friends invited) so I know they would not be offended at all if I put out a tip jar for the bartenders, but FH's family is a little more traditional so I don't know if this is rude? What do you think?

38 Comments

Latest activity by Vicky, on May 13, 2020 at 2:52 AM
  • T.
    Master November 2013
    T. ·
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    I don't see an issue with it or even how it could be rude at all. My venue placed a tip jar and it was filled throughout the night. My vote is to do it. Smiley smile

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  • Maltese
    Master June 2015
    Maltese ·
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    Tip Jar for sure (I used to do a lot of events as a bartender). The pay works like this (if its all on the books and legit): The bartender/servers are given a "Party Pay" with a higher hourly rate then they normally make (which is usually $3 or less and hour) because technically they are working in an environment where they do not have the ability to generate their usual sales and get the tips.

    But what happens to most bartenders and servers is that this money is added to their weekly check and a lot of times they barely see any of the pay due to the taxes that have to be paid during the pay period on the tips they are claiming.

    Whether or not you put a jar out there, there are some generous people out there who will still throw down a tip, so let the bartenders try to earn enough beer money for after the clean up or make enough to pay their past due electric bill!

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  • Zzil
    Master October 2014
    Zzil ·
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    I personally wouldn't allow them to. I'm going to great lengths to make sure that our guests do not have to open their wallets for anything. I'm already tipping them a minimum of 20% so they will be compensated fairly IMO.

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  • Dr. & Mrs. R
    Devoted June 2015
    Dr. & Mrs. R ·
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    I know personally, our crowd will tip with or without a jar. We will be tipping them as well.

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  • Cricket Catering
    Cricket Catering ·
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    Most venues here don't allow a tip jar to be out. They still get plenty of tips. People will still leave the tip on the bar. The bartender will keep a cup under the bar to stash it out of sight.

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  • Maltese
    Master June 2015
    Maltese ·
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    Again, this is also a regional question...in Michigan, YES many venues do allow tip jars for the bartenders to keep out AT THE DISCRETION of the bride and groom.

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  • JS081615
    Super August 2015
    JS081615 ·
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    I'm neutral here - I don't know if we are going to do it, and they ARE getting tipped by you at the end of the night anyway, but I know that every wedding I go to, I always throw an extra dollar or two in at open bars when I get a drink, depending on what it is. I think most people that I know just do it automatically, as if you were at a regular bar.

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  • SunshineJenn
    Master August 2014
    SunshineJenn ·
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    To me, a tip jar is ASKING for money. People who WANT to tip, which is generous for an open bar, will do so without the jar.

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  • E
    Master July 2015
    Emma ·
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    The tip for the bartenders will already be paid for before the wedding.

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  • Sally
    Super October 2014
    Sally ·
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    That's a good point, on my side I know everyone will tip regardless, they won't need a prompt to do so, so just let it happen, let them leave their jar UNDER the bar and that way any one who may be offended by seeing a tip jar just won't even know! Thank you thank you! It's just weird because so much of my FH's family is from out of town and I've never met them so I know the way we do things down here but I don't want to accidentally offend anyone (including my awesome servers and bartenders that will be helping us on our big day, want them to make as much money as they can!) Thanks for the help/input!

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  • MJBride
    VIP July 2015
    MJBride ·
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    I'm pro tip jar at a wedding. I've been in the service industry for 10 years, and have bartended at a couple wedding venues. One which we were only allowed to have a tip jar if the bride or groom requested one. One thought to go by is this, the gratuity that you pay doesn't all go to the staff who serve you. At one place I work it was a 15% gratuity that got added to the final bill. The gratuity got split up. So it would look like this, 1% - wait staff and bartenders, 2% on site banquet managers, 3% your events person, 9% executives of the venue/the venue itself. Your wait staff and bartenders don't receive that much. Some events I would sell $**** at the bar and only get $40 worth of gratuity out of it all.

    And to me a tip jar doesn't say "I'm serving you, you HAVE to tip me", it's an option, some people will and some people won't. Some will tip if there is no tip jar, and others won't.

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  • Mrs. F-u-...
    Master December 2014
    Mrs. F-u-... ·
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    If you can afford it, I would tip the bartenders directly. This way your guests do not feel obligated to tip and if they try to, the bartenders can say they have already been taken care of.

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  • Finally Mrs Gee
    Master April 2015
    Finally Mrs Gee ·
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    Thanks for this post! I posted that I was pro tip jar at open bar a while back and not everyone shared my view! I am pro tip jar on top of the gratuity we are paying. If I know my family well, the bartenders will deserve it

    *edited for spelling

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  • Sally
    Super October 2014
    Sally ·
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    Now I'm confused again I should stop reading comments lol

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  • Samantha
    Master May 2013
    Samantha ·
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    I didn't expect my guests to pay the tip...I took care of it. We tipped 20% at the end of the night. I'm sure people slipped the bartender extra, but I didn't want to have a tip jar out because it makes it look like I'm expecting the guests to cover it.

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    No. people will tip them anyway and the tips should be swept away and hidden. it's crude at a hosted event, and I personally hate it.

    I ran an upscale catering company for 25 years and we never let our bartenders put tip cups up. The bartenders (like every other staff member) were paid upwards of 20.00 an hour.

    And MJ; that sounds borderline illegal. One of my huge pet peeves it venues that charge a 'gratuity' and then don't give it to the people who actually worked the event. The executives of a venue don't get gratuities. That's bullshit.

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  • LadyMonk
    Master September 2014
    LadyMonk ·
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    I've voting NO to the tip jar. If your friends and family want to tip, they will and they don't need a jar to tell them to. If people don't want to tip, they will feel obligated to since seeing a tip jar there is saying that tip is expected and otherwise the staff will not get tipped (which is not cool). I think especially since it's an open bar, guests shouldn't have to pay anything. If they know it's an open bar, some people may not bring cash and then feel guilty when they see the tip jar.

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  • *Mrs_D*
    Master October 2014
    *Mrs_D* ·
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    This is so interesting! I had never seen it like this before- I always thought a tip jar was just a thing, and had never heard the "con" arguments of them.

    Thanks for opening my eyes, ladies. We will definitely not have our bartender put one out.

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  • T.
    Master November 2013
    T. ·
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    I didn't expect our guests to pay for anything. We paid a 20% gratuity in addition to our bill. On the other side of this coin, we didn't see the $$ being put in the staff members' pockets, so at the end of the evening, we don't really know where it went or even how it is divided.

    IMO, I agree with some of the ladies here who say that people who want to tip will do so with or without a jar. I don't think a tip jar suggests anything except that you're welcome to leave a tip if you choose. This is not a bill, therefore, there is no expectation of payment.

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  • Cricket Catering
    Cricket Catering ·
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    Different caterers do things differently. Some charge for cake cutting and corkage fees. Some don't. Most pay a higher wage since catering staff tend not to work a full week and won't earn what a restaurant waitress will in tips. Some charge a gratuity and have a myriad of ways in which to split it. I have never, ever seen a place that gave management part of any tip. If they were doing that, I don't imagine they were telling staff and giving a specific breakdown of the tip. Occasionally, a couple with send the tip after the wedding is over. Not one person has asked us to see how much the total tip was. Some companies leave the tip up to you. The main point is to read your contract and talk to your caterer.

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