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I should not feel upset about this.

Hello, my WW girls! I have missed you all! Married life has been phenomenal--I love my husband more and more every single day. :) But here's the story...
We are both college seniors, and we are in no way trying to conceive at this time. We are both barely in our mid-twenties, and we'd like to have a little "us" time before we bring a bundle of joy into the world. However, I have not received my period in over a month, and we were wondering if we had not been adequately careful. I took a test tonight, and while--logically--I understand that a child is in NO WAY best for us right now. . .I can't tell you how overwhelmingly disappointing it was to read, "Not pregnant" on the ept test. What in the world is wrong with me?! And what are the chances that the test is wrong? Did any mommies know for sure when they were pregnant?
I am not really experiencing any pregnancy symptoms, but I still can't shake the feeling. Oh, the conflicts of the head and heart. :)

Posted On: Nov 3, 2009 at 10:58 PM | Vendors are allowed to participate

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FutureMrsMinich

Married: 06/12/2009

21 Comments | Login or Signup to post a comment!

Laura K.

Married: 05/15/2009
Reviews: 7

Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 11:03 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
first off, HI!! Been a while, good to see you back! go to the doctor or take another test. False negatives are definitely possible. Even if you're not pregnant you should go to the doctor to find out why you haven't had your period in so long. As for being disappointed when you know in your head it's not the right time for a baby yet, that's totally normal! You've had a whole month to get used to the possibility of a baby so of course it's weird to see the negative. Even in the hardest times a baby can be a joy. So while I'm glad you want to wait and KNOW that's the best thing, don't beat yourself up for being a little in love with the idea of being a mommy! You'll be there when the time is right. But for now please, GO TO A DOCTOR!!

CelticChick831

Married: 10/17/2009
Reviews: 7

Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 11:08 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I can understand where you are coming from. I love kids and know I want them one day but know that financially we are just not ready, but if I found out tomorrow I was pregnant, I dont think I could help but be happy. While you know it isnt the best thing right now, a part of you is probably excited at the idea of having a family and just the thought that it might be real awakened that part of you. Stress can cause late periods and totally missed ones too. Other things can cause it also. I have heard of women just KNOWING they were pregnant and when the test kept saying "no your not" they wouldnt take no for and answer. My mom was one of them. She just knew she was expecting my sister and every test came back negative until one day she finally got a positive test. (navy wouldnt make a OB appt without a positive home test or 3 missed periods, so she had to keep testing) I say give it another week or two and then use one of those more expensive early detection tests.

Not-A-Bridezilla

Wedding: 05/15/2010

Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 11:12 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Its definitely easier to get a false negative than a false positive. It could be that you just conceived and it is too early to tell unless you take the pregnancy test in the morning, when the hCG hormone is at its highest. As far as your feelings.... I completely understand where you are coming from. On the one hand you know that at this point in time in your life you are NOT ready for a child (not that you wouldn't be a good mom, just that the timing isn't right). Even though you don't want to have a baby right now, a part of you is very much in love with your husband so having a baby would make that love even more "complete". I get it-- I'm finishing up my college career this January and don't want to get pregnant because a) I don't want to walk down the aisle pregnant and b) we aren't ready for a baby finanically or emotionally.... but every time I have a pregnancy scare even though I don't want it to happen it's like....damn it almost would have been nice.

Not-A-Bridezilla

Wedding: 05/15/2010

Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 11:13 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
(cont) all the conflicting emotions suck but for some reason they're there. I would agree with PP-- if you still go for a few more weeks without a period just go to the doctor. It could be stress.... or you could be pregnant.

Leeann

Wedding: 11/11/2011

Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 11:16 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I was watching the news today they were talking about the hormone that detects pregnancy and sometimes theres not enough of this hormone so it doesnt show part of the line on the pregnancy test or its really faded I wouldnt waste my money to get another test I would go for a blood test at your drs just in case and I am not even married yet and thought I was pregnant a while back and was pretty bummed to find out I wasn't.

Married: 10/17/2009

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 4:28 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
When I wasn't married, I thought it would be so nice to conceive on my honeymoon or shortly thereafter. Now that I am married, I actually want to wait and enjoy just the two of us now. And we are much older than you two. I think it would be nice for you to travel and enjoy couplehood for a few years. I know what you mean about conflict because I am a total gaga over babies and toddlers, but really spend a week with your friends who have them or be stuck on a plane with the crying for 10 hours plus and no where to go, and you will quickly see reality.

MJ Decorations

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 7:08 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I was never sure. It's probably just stress. Don't worry. I was 30 when my first one was born, and I'm very glad I waited. It's nice to get all the travel and career and couple time in your 20's so you can settle down and raise kids without thinking, "Maybe I'm missing something?" Whatever happens, I'm sure you'll be ok. We like to torture ourselves!

lauren10

Married: 08/29/2009
Reviews: 5

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 10:57 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
How late is your period? A lot of things could make your cycle get messed up. Are you eating enough? Too much soy? Stressed out? Hanging out with women who are on a different cycle? A false negative is a possiblity too. The Dr can clear that up for you. Good luck!

reddiva22

Wedding: [Private]

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 11:02 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Hi MRS. MINCH, I know what you mean, I had a scare once too and its disappointing when its negative. I know exactly how you feel, its like you know your not ready but its like at the same time you picture what it could be like being a mom. Trust me, I have experienced that b.4, Good luck, and remember it will happen when its supposed to.

Chelsea

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 3

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 8:53 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Mrs. Minich, It is perfectly normal for you to feel disappointed even though you do not want to start trying yet. like PP said, it will happen when you are ready and you will def. be that much more excited when it does! Good luck on your senior year!

JulyBride

Married: 07/25/2009
Reviews: 5

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 9:42 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Hi MRS. Minich! I have wondered where you have been! Yes, it is possible to get a false negative, so you really should get a blood test done to know for sure. However it ends up turning out, I wish the best for you! If your not pregnant, know that it will happen when it is meant to be, and if you are, than it is!

FutureMrsMinich

Married: 06/12/2009

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 9:43 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
You guys are so great! Most of my friends are all still in the "single and party" mode, so they cannot imagine being married...least of all having a child! They would look at me like I was insane if I told them about this. I LOVE having a supporting network of women like you ladies! And as much as we BOTH have baby fever, I've got acres student loans to pay off before I can afford having a baby. Because I know once I do, I'm going to want to spoil him rotten. ;) Laura, I will definitely be headed to the dr. soon. I've never been so irregular that I skipped a period completely--this is odd. I'll keep you updated on the results! Thanks again! You guys rock!

Shell

Married: 06/27/2009

Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 11:05 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
where have you been!?!? we've missed you! seems like the other ladies have got this covered... just wanted to say hi :]

FutureMrsMinich

Married: 06/12/2009

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:23 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Hey, shell! I've been so busy, and I decided to stop by once again. I am afraid I have come back to madness..... Haha. These boards have turned into something insane! What in the world...?

Laura K.

Married: 05/15/2009
Reviews: 7

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:25 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
eh ignore it, you'll be better off! LOL

FutureMrsMinich

Married: 06/12/2009

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 12:33 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
I have to say, though, Miss Laura.... I completely agree with you. There are inherent risks in posting on the internet. You essentially sign a universally understood waiver that you are, by choice, putting your information out on the information highway for the taking. Unfortunately, when you do so, you are NOT able to dictate the way it is received! You also cannot control the way people are going to respond! I would always try to disagree respectfully with people--I've never personally felt the need to be snarky. And I understand why people are pulling together to try to protect themselves. However, I am not sure that this is something that CAN be protected without completely obliterating a God-given right: freedom of speech! Of course, this is not what this thread is about. But, as you've suggested it, I'm going to stay out of it. I just wanted you to know that I think you are brilliant. Come to Texas and be my friend.

Laura K.

Married: 05/15/2009
Reviews: 7

Posted On: Nov 05, 2009 at 1:05 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
aaww so much love in that! I guess people in Texas really ARE super friendly! Anytime cowgirl ;)

Marcelle

Wedding: 06/25/2010

Posted On: Nov 09, 2009 at 11:44 PM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Hi Mrs. Minich, Yes, as the other ladies said, your period can be off for a number of reasons. The best thing to do is get a blood test which will tell you one way or the other - 100%. This is my second marriage and I have an 18 year old son. My FH does not have any children, but we decided that we did not want to have children. However, if I did become pregnant, we would also be happy. My first pregnancy was unexpected - my son is my pride and joy!! Good luck however it turns out - you are with the person that you love and however this goes, it will all be good.

Unsatisfied

Wedding: 07/25/2010

Posted On: Nov 10, 2009 at 2:12 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
Even the times we SOOOOOO don't want to get pregnant the mother in us is disappointed when the test says "negative". You are NORMAL and you'll make a great mother!

guerita

Wedding: 05/15/2010

Posted On: Nov 10, 2009 at 4:40 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
It could also be your birth control going haywire, if you're on it. That happened to me about a year ago and I was freaking out! I took like 4-5 pregnancy tests! (All negative). My OBGYN confirmed it, too. Now, because of the birth control, I haven't had a period for a year . Definitely go to the doctor. I totally understand the head & heart conflict... I'm a bit older than you and part of me wants to have kids right away. But, I also want at least six months to two years of baby-free marriage time! Our lives will completely change once we have kids! And, of course having lots of college debt doesn't help... (I'm in the same boat), but if that's the only reason you're holding back you'll never have kids because there will always be something financial that seemingly gets in the way, i.e. mortgage, car payments, etc.

Nicole

Wedding: 06/12/2010

Posted On: Nov 11, 2009 at 9:50 AM \| Flag As Inappropriate
It will happen but i understand. I had the same thing happen to me. When you both are ready it will happen. I am going to be a newlywed in June so I am happy to hear marriage is wonderful:)

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