Join Now   |   Log In   |   Are You A Vendor?
 
Really interesting wedding vendor viewpoint on brides and budgets
I was doing some research since FSIL is in town. I ran across this article about brides and budgets from a vendor point of view. To be honest, I'm not 100% sure how I feel about it. Tell me what you think - vendors, too:

A ruthless discussion of the term 'Budget Bride' and wedding decision making

A couple of days ago, I posted an item about the differences between money (price), value, budget and result. It generated lots of traffic, a comment or two, and plenty of direct email.

It also caused me to consider the phrase, ‘budget bride.’ Along with DIY Bride, these are two of the most annoying and poorly used descriptors in the wedding industry. To a great degree, I lay that at the feet of my friends in mass media for the wedding industry. Mass media tends to be a popularization tool as much as an information source. If you repeat a phrase, such as ‘budget bride,’ often enough, it becomes part of the wedding lexicon, for better for worse.


The O-fficial MrsJoseph!
Community Megastar

Married: 09/04/2010
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:06 PM | Vendors are allowed | Add to My Watchlist | Flag As Inappropriate

70 Comments | Login or Signup to post a comment!


The O-fficial MrsJoseph!
Community Megastar

Married: 09/04/2010
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:06 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
The problem with these phrases is they paint the bride’s resources with the grayest of brush strokes. So, at the risk of being more precise, I’ll break it down from my experience.

Read more: http://weddingmarketing.net/2009/06/19/ruthless-discussion-term-budget-bride/#ixzz0ukKLSii2


Brooklynne
Community Megastar

Married: 07/17/2010
Reviews: 6
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:12 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Very interesting article... I am an average budget bride in the article, yet a high budget bride compared to many of us on this forum. I love the statement at the end about the $12K bride having the 50K wedding based on choices.
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:14 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Interesting find, MrsJoseph. I think the article is pretty good, albeit a bit abrasive in some ways. I'll keep my own personal perspective out of it, but I will say this (even though I know I've said it half a million times before): weddings are expensive. Always have been, always will be. True, it's important to figure out what one can realistically afford to spend on this day. I think the thing that irks vendors more than anything is when people's expectations and their budgets are misaligned. The bride who wants glamorous, high-quality photography for $500 is setting herself up for disappointment, for example. Likewise for the bride who wants an opulent five-course gourmet meal for 150 for $15/person. In the end, it comes down to what matters most to the client. And I always remind my brides about the 3D's: your DAY, your DOLLAR, and your DECISION.

Officially His Mrs P.
Community Megastar

Married: 10/09/2010
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:15 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
LOVE IT!!! esp the part about "what a budget is not"

I will have to agree with the author on this one.....I am guilty of my budget being comprised of what I can afford & what the parents are contributing, as well as "having a nice reception for the number of guests that are invited."

This is the ONLY party I've ever thrown so it has to be the GREATEST!!!!!

The O-fficial MrsJoseph!
Community Megastar

Married: 09/04/2010
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:17 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I do like the fact that he states that vendors should do a better job of trying to educate brides vs just expecting them to pay the vendor

What makes me a little uncomfortable is the fact that we are in categories based upon amount of money possibly spent.

In my work world, a client is a client is a client. It doesn't matter if one client spends more than another since the client is still paying us. Our clienst with lower business are not less important than our clients with more business - nor do we differ in how we treat them.


Amy "Been here too long" W.
Community Megastar

Married: 11/05/2011
Reviews: 7
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:20 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I think the author has it right. My first budget was a dart throw until I found out how much wedding stuff costs. I am considered average budget and I wasn't offended, but I'm sure brides with the lower tier budget will balk.

Kat L.
Community Superstar

Married: 1+ year ago
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:21 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
The one thing I disagree with is a DIY bride spending under $5k. I'm a DIY bride, and the reason is only partially budget...mostly I just want the day to be mine, not something I could've bought off the shelf.
It's an interesting perspective though.
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:24 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Very true, MrsJoseph. There are many of us (vendors) who frequent these forums and attempt to educate brides about value for cost and share useful information on how and when to save money appropriately. Sometimes, it works. Other times, unfortunately, it gets met with a lot of resistance. It's a shame, too, because the advice we give is (ahem) FREE. Costs nothing to ask us a question and get an honest answer. Granted, a bride might not want to hear that answer, but I can positively say that there's not a vendor here who has failed to give an honest and accurate answer to any question posed by a bride. And I do know that a lot of vendors who gauge a client's "worth" based on how much they spend and lump them into categories, and I disagree with that philosophy.

The O-fficial MrsJoseph!
Community Megastar

Married: 09/04/2010
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:30 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
@Kat - I agree. I tried to do a lot of DIY stuff. It may not always work, but I wanted to insert myself into my wedding. Not just have the cookie cutter stuff you can buy. In addition I wanted to combine the style difference between me & my FS. Not to say that I didn't DIY stuff to save money, too. But its not the ONLY reason.

Amy "Been here too long" W.
Community Megastar

Married: 11/05/2011
Reviews: 7
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:31 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
While lumping us brides by budget sounds harsh we do the same to vendors. We assume that a cheap photog must be crappy and a knockoff dress must be of poor quality.

The O-fficial MrsJoseph!
Community Megastar

Married: 09/04/2010
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:33 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
@Brian - You're right. A lot of vendors do give free advice here. And we have all had some (occasionally) caustic or emotional conversations regarding the cost of doing a wedding. I do appriecate the time that you and others like you - vendors who obv. love their work and take pride in it - who take the time to explain the WHY of things. I have to admit that it did change my view on a lot of pricing that I see. It also made me check some of my priorities regarding my budget and where I would allocate money. Thank you for that.

Kathy R.
Community Megastar

Married: 07/24/2010
Reviews: 6
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:40 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
In my world, the wine world..the people who spend the least are the most demanding. Seriously. It is crazy.


Planning my daughters wedding, I did not run in to any pricing snags as I have experience planning events. Whew!


One unexpected thing that came up for us....the corkage fee for the wines that we brought. The GM of the restaurant side of the hotel is a friend of mine. He waived room fees and the bar tender fee. Well, when we went to make the final payment, he waived the corkage fee! That represented around $560!!!!

Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:40 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Well, that's actually kind of accurate, Amy. I always worry when I see a photographer (or any vendor, really) whose services are significantly less than those of their area competitors. By "significantly", I mean 10% or more. A true professional has overhead, and in order to keep up with that overhead, they necessarily have to charge elevated rates in order to stay afloat. A photographer who charges $500 (in most areas of the country) and offers a whole package full of goodies literally CANNOT be a true professional...there's just no way, they'd lose money. Their work may be good, granted, but - as I've been saying a lot recently - there are some serious risks to hiring them. Doesn't make them "crappy" per se.

Meghan B.
Community Megastar

Married: 08/20/2011
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:47 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I have no problem spending money on quality goods and services. I for one understand that if I pay a photographer $500, I'm going to get $500 worth of work- which is very little. Heck, you aren't going to get too much work out of me for $500 at my day job- why should I expect differently from a professional?
What irks me is when a vendor (more retail locations) stick the word 'wedding' on something, so that automatically triples it's value. A small satin pillow versus a 'ring' pillow- triple the price and all the manufacturer did was stick a cheap bow on it. A pretty dress versus a 'bridesmaid" dress.
I am a budget bride, through and through. To me it's not about resources- it's about smart use of the resources. I'm making many of my own decorations- not just because of budget, but because my dollar stretches farther and I get EXACTLY what I want and it's not what anyone else has! It's also just fun for me!

Amy "Been here too long" W.
Community Megastar

Married: 11/05/2011
Reviews: 7
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:48 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
@Brian-I agree with you and actually learned about it from your other posts.:) I was just saying that vendors put us in catagories just like we do to them.

Kathy R.
Community Megastar

Married: 07/24/2010
Reviews: 6
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:49 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
From the article:


"Low Budget Bride (Budget: $5000 – $14,999) Has the resources, but will have to make some tough decisions on the reception. The big conundrum is whether to economize across the board or cut in specific areas, and not others.""

Wow, I guess it depends on who you know.....we just did a very elegant wedding (last night) right around $9k (I do not have the final hotel numbers yet). It was elegant, the food was really good, the wine stunning (given to us by my ex GM who owns a Napa winery), the ceremony music was performed by two grammy winners. Again, it can be who you know, or how you make selections, that dictate price.


Low budget? REALLY? My daughters wedding, low budget? Nope. High end wedding, savvy spending.


Heck, they are honeymooning for a week on my dime in a lovely 3 bdrm/2 bath condo....it set me back $1k. A one bedroom unit there would have run $2k, but I know someone with a larger condo. That one, again, is "who you know".

Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:51 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I like the author's bullet for budget. That is a very true point. Every couple needs to figure out their budget before they start planning. Figure out where the money is going to come from (you alone, bride's family, groom's family, other family). Once you know that, you can start moving ahead.


Also, there are national figures for wedding costs. If you live in a rural area, your experience will be much different from a bride in a big city.


In your area, certain vendors will generally cost a certain amount (photography, DJ). Others (florists, caterers) might have more of a range or will have a larger range of prices. Other items will generally be based on a nationwide price (dress, invitations) but with a huge range.


These are all things to consider early in the wedding planning. Then, you can determine what you can spend on various items and where you might be able to DIY.

Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:51 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
In all cases, you should plan ahead so you can stick to your budget, whether it's $3,000 or $30,000. Just be realistic about what you can afford, what the costs are in your area, and what kind of wedding you will be happy with.


And, always remember, it costs very little to actually get married. The rest of the cost is to throw a party for your friends and family.


Meghan B.
Community Megastar

Married: 08/20/2011
Reviews: 3
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:51 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Kathy- I want to know YOU!

2d Bride
Community Megastar

Married: 10/06/2009
Reviews: 10
Posted On: Jul 25, 2010 at 9:51 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I would question this part:

A budget is:

  • A study of the range of what wedding products and services cost in your area, balanced against your tastes, inspirations and fantasies.
  • Factored by the number of guests you choose to invite.
My tastes, inspirations, and fantasies might be that I would have a platinum wedding. However, no matter how much research I do on the cost of such a wedding, I'm not going to have that wedding if I can manage to save only $500 for it. So budget does have to include some consideration of "the total amount in the parent’s bank account or your bank account," if only as a maximum.
Login or Signup to post a comment!
 

What's Popular...


Vow of Conduct