Paying for the wedding yourself?
Is anyone doing this? Due to financial woes that have come our way it appears that I'll be the only one able to pay for the wedding at this point. FH has come across some hard times and I've told him that we should reschedule the wedding and he keeps saying "everything will be ok" and "we'll make our wedding happen." At this point I don't think it will. I can probably pay for it myself but it seems weird to me. Are any brides out there dishing out more of their own money than FH? Or completely paying for the whole wedding?

Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 1
Posted On: Apr 6, 2012 at 6:03 PM • Vendors are allowed • Add to My WatchlistFlag As Inappropriate1 like

56 Comments | Login or Signup to post a comment!

Married: 11/17/2012
Apr 07, 2012 at 8:04 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Guess you could say I'm fortunate. My parents are paying for everything. I paid a little on my dress, but my mom and dad are footing the bill. My fiance's dad is paying for the rehearsal dinner and honeymoon.

I'm very grateful for this!

Married: 10/31/2012
Reviews: 7
Apr 07, 2012 at 9:27 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
FH is paying for our whole wedding including my dress and everything himself. I don't work. I am a stay at home mom because that is what he would like me to do. I am doing all the scheduling and planning for the wedding.

Married: 10/14/2012
Reviews: 1
Apr 07, 2012 at 9:31 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Unfortunately for us, my FH is in this situation. We got engaged in September, and then I lost my job in October, so he is paying for everything himself. We have no help from outside family other then that my mom bought my dress. It sucks, but FH makes good money and we can pay for it, I just feel bad that I can't find another job and can't really contribute.

Married: 06/02/2012
Apr 07, 2012 at 9:43 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I guess I should clarify, it's not weird to me that one person is contributing more, it's more the fact that your fh is pushing fwd when ultimately if you are footing the bill it should be more your decision if you feel comfortable moving fwd with just your contribution. If you feel comfortable with it and you plan on sharing money post wedding anyway the source of funds for nuptials doesn't really matter right?

Married: 06/23/2012
Apr 07, 2012 at 9:44 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
We are both paying, but at times it seems that I am picking up more of the tab, just because I have been doing all the planning and bookings. No help from our parents (mine have passed on and FH parents can't afford to help), but we are happy with what we have choosen to spend our money on. There has been a lot of things that we wanted to do, but have cut out of the wedding due to costs. At first I was upset with having to cut things and guests, but in the end my bank account wont be dained. I did put my foot down and got the wedding cake I wanted, instead one from a store.

Most of our friends and family are contributing to the wedding to help us out. A friend is doing hair namd make up, FH brother is a DJ, so he will provide music, friend and family help BBQ, a friend is taking pictures... we have asked for no gifts from our guests, as they are already doing so much for us already.

Married: 06/02/2012
Reviews: 1
Apr 07, 2012 at 10:00 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
At the beginning of the planning, it was me paying for all of the odds and ends, but after me having to have surgery and going to see doctors in the past few months FH has really picked up the slack. I think it happens like that sometimes in a relationship. I am sure there will be other times when I have to carry us too. We are receiving some minimal help from family, and we appreciate that very much. Just be patient with your FH. Everything will work out in the end.

Married: 05/04/2013
Reviews: 5
Apr 07, 2012 at 12:00 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
FH and I have a bank account together where we each put the same amount of money in every Friday. He has been contributing a bit more than I have, but all in all we have pretty much been contributing evenly. The depost for our venue was all me because we hadn't started saving at that point but I know that asking for his help contributing will never be an issue. Don't worry about it hunny. Everyone goes through hard time. As long as you know that he's not a freeloader! LOL J/K

Married: 10/06/2012
Reviews: 5
Apr 07, 2012 at 12:04 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
My FH and I started out paying for it completely ourselves. When my dad saw that we had everything budgeted and planned/paid for, he gave us money. Not exactly sure why. BUT we werent always this good at financial planning. We DID cut back on a LOT of things. Dinners out, movies, trips to the mall, nights out at the bars, trips to NYC, all these things had to go. Now, we really LOVE staying home in our apartment and watching movies/playing video games with each other. I think for us everything worked out really well , by saving for our wedding we've managed to reconnect and strengthen our bond. We have this " its us against the world" attitude. And , we still have the money my dad gave us, we haven't spent it, just in case he holds it against us we can give it right back which might come soon. So i guess my best advice is just cut back, evaluate what your "must haves" and "dont really needs" are.

Married: 08/17/2012
Reviews: 11
Apr 07, 2012 at 1:53 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
We are paying for it ourselves... have to keep it under $3K. Here is how it is working... I am paying for everything BUT the rings. Sigh. It's hard and frustrated but it is doable.
Edited On: Apr 07, 2012 at 1:53 PM

Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 1
Apr 07, 2012 at 4:58 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
@ Sami yeah I remember when we first moved in together he footed most of bill and paid for a lot t of household items we needed. I know after his financial situation subsides we'll be back to normal.

@ Sky we're also keeping it under 3k so I know hard it is. either way we'll be surrounded by people who love us and we'll be man and wife at the end of the day. The financial pressure was getting to me but I feel much better about it knowing this is not at all out of the norm.

Soon to be Mrs R
Married: 06/30/2012
Reviews: 6
Apr 07, 2012 at 6:05 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
We are paying the majority of it. My mm is paying for the flowers and the photographer. My dad is paying for the RD and singing at the cermony. FH is paying the rest. I am in school right and not working as much. Sometimes it bothers me at first because money is tight. Now I am like we are doing this togeher.

Married: 09/21/2012
Apr 07, 2012 at 6:09 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
My FH and I said we'd split it evenly, but so far he hasn't put a dime in. Also, my dad gave us $600 towards it which is greatly appreciated. Because of our budget, we are having a small wedding. However, everything is included. For nearly $4000, we got a DJ, catering (two entrees two sides and one salad), cake, 4 hour reception, open bar, and so on. It was a very good deal.

Married: 07/20/2012
Reviews: 5
Apr 07, 2012 at 6:12 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I have put out more money than FH but I know that we are doing it together. FH has a different financial situation then mine and I knew that before we planned the wedding but we agreed we both will make it happen. It bothered me at first but he helps when he can and that's all I can ask.

Married: 09/15/2012
Reviews: 8
Apr 07, 2012 at 7:07 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Yes - FH is paying for the honeymoon and rehearsal dinner; I am paying for the rest. I think that is pretty traditional. My parents are deceased and times are tight, but my brother left me a small inheritance when he passed away and I am using some of that to pay for the wedding - about $5k.

If FH really wants to go ahead with the wedding and you can pull it off - I say go for it

Married: 05/05/2012
Apr 07, 2012 at 7:46 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
My fh and I are paying for our wedding ourselves and I believe that I have put out more money than he has but it doesn't matter because we share finances. If you want your big day to happen and you have the finances to do it why does it matter who puts out the most money. I would pay for everything if I had to in order to marry the man that I love.

Married: 08/31/2012
Apr 07, 2012 at 9:28 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Our bank accounts are joint, and we paying for the wedding all on our own, no help from anyone :-( ....
But if you dont think you can pay for the wedding yourself, or you think it will be pretty tight, why dont you just get married for now at the city hall & then eventually do the big wedding, it will be sooo much easier
Apr 14, 2012 at 2:41 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I paid for my entire wedding, kinda hurt my feelings a bit, but this was a million years that I am in the wedding biz, I look at things differently and encourage our brides to focus on the commitment of the day and not the money. We are lucky that we have figured out how to offer very cost efffective and beautiful weddings to our brides..
Login or Signup to post a comment!

Vow of Conduct