Help! Pastor Won't Marry you!

Everyone has the right to their beliefs and thank goodness for that! I chose to believe that god doesn't discriminate - christian/jewish/islamic/hindu - if you are a good person, with love in your heart, you will go to heaven

@ sharon- I dont mean to play devils advocate, or start a debate or argument, I just feel urged to share: The Bible makes it abundantly clear that all of us are tainted by and infected with sin (Ecclesiastes 7:20; Romans 6:23; 1 John 1:8). Romans 3:10-18 could not be clearer about the non-existence of “good” people: “There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one. Their throats are open graves; their tongues practice deceit. The poison of vipers is on their lips. Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness. Their feet are swift to shed blood; ruin and misery mark their ways, and the way of peace they do not know. There is no fear of God before their eyes.” Every human being on this planet deserves to be thrown into hell at this very moment. Every second we spend alive is only by the grace and mercy of God.

@Shell - I can agree that an unmarried man & woman living in the same house together could cause temptation - but we're talking about closing and locking the barn door after the horse is gone. I have never seen God get caught up on technical difficulties. So it still end up that two people are "living in sin" and want to come out - and the pastor is saying "if you don't do it my way, stay in sin." Still makes no sense to me. I've also heard that God rates the conversion of a sinful soul higher than that of a holy man - because the sinful soul had to go through more to reach God....

@shell - unfortunately, Hindu's/Islam/Buddhists don't go by the bible for their beliefs, as you are a christian I understand you follow the bible and believe all that is written as coming from god. Millions of people in this world don't and I can't discount one religion's beliefs over another, so I chose to believe that god loves everyone regardless of their religion. I don't discount your belief and I commend you for standing up for them.

Im sorry MrsJ I think I'm a bit confused?? can u explain what you mean?

@July - totally agree, there are many religious books out there of which the bible is only one. I lean towards the buddhist teachings myself. Religion has caused more wars than anything else in history - believe in your god, but remember everyone has the same right as you - to your own beliefs and teachinigs

Muslims & Islams are pointed to jesus & the Bible in the Qur'an

True Christians are followers of Isa/Jesus. Since the Qur’an commended Isa, faithful Muslims should study Isa’s teachings and obey them (Surah 3:48-49; 5:46). What does the Qur’an say about Isa?

Allah sent Isa, supporting Him with the Holy Spirit (Surah 2:87)

Allah exalted Isa (Surah 2:253)

Isa was righteous and sinless (Surah 3:46; 6:85; 19:19)

Isa was raised from the dead (Surah 19:33-34)

Allah commanded Isa to establish a religion (Surah 42:13)

Isa ascended into heaven (Surah 4:157-158)

@ july- getting back to the pastor not wanting to marry them from a biblical stand point, i just took what the bible said to support him & his beliefs, which are also my beliefs. (which is what this original post was about)I wouldnt just come into any post & start preachin unless thats what is asked lol.

@LU- you can thank bible college and the good Lord for that lol :]

Here endeth the first lesson...lol

love how we can actually discuss religion and not take it personally.

I agree! I will let you all know what comes of it!

@Shell - I can't quote anything to you LOL - but in class (relig. ed) we discussed the "worth" of a soul to God vs satan. Since I can't quote the passage to you, I'll just explain as I remember the conversation. I don’t often have religious conversations outside of relig. ed so don’t go getting all technical on me!

All men are created equal and God loves us all the same. But there are souls in flux - people who are more sinful than others. These souls are "weighted" (for lack of a better word). God appreciates the reception of a soul weighted with sin more than that of a holy man (because the holy man is “expected” but the sinner is “reclaimed”).

On a side note, not that I think the paster should change his beliefs, just that they don't make sense to me

"I know this means I'm going straight to hell, but when my church asked where FH and I live, I gave them both of our parents' addresses even though we've been living together a year and a half."

Wow Rosie that is a pretty bold lie! Are you getting married in a church just for show? Doesn't sound like you are very religious. Sorry if I am being harsh jsut speaking my mind.

MrsJ I'm not sure about that... if you can find the verse that would be helpful.

Yes, God loves everyone. Jesus did not come to save the righteous, but the unrighteous. As far as saying Gos is happier or "appreciates the reception of a soul weighted with sin more than that of a holy man"... I dont think i can agree because of what Paul writes in Romans 6- no one is good.

Well, I can't find the verse but I can tell you it was a priest (one always leads) who told us this.

Ok here's what you can do and i think this'll work. I also live w/my man and i'm now worried. i'm 2 months pregnant and we want to be hitched asap! I'm a Christian and he's sort of but neither of us go to church. I really want a pastor to marry us and was thinking of calling my mom's church to see if they will marry us. If not, then we'll just go courhouse style and re-do the "real" wedding later next year. once you're married going to a church for a "formal" wedding shouldn't be a problem, i'd say. Hope this helps

I so agree with Shell!!! If the pastor said move out and you don't want to, I am sorry but he has a right to stick with his beliefs. He is a leader, a teacher and a role model for his church. Think about his stakes. Sharon, I am sorry but I disagree about million of people don't believe in God. Guess what? 98 percent of Americans believe in God :-). For the best, find another pastor who can accept you guys living together before marriage. It is not cool to disrespect the pastor for saying to move out. He was just trying to do his job. If you don't like it, switch pastors. It is that simple and Shell, I like you! :-)

@Megan - I didn't say millions of people don't believe in god, I said millions of people in the world don't believe that the bible is written from god. Christian people make up around 32% of the world's population, definitely not the majority.

I don't see it as a discrimination thing-- more as a guilty conscience thing.. the bible says that leaders of the church are held to a higher degree of responsibility. Obviously I don't believe in people being discriminated against but I can understand how a pastor's own beliefs would stop him from marrying a couple. It's the same thing as marrying gay people.... In his eyes it is a holy commitment between the couple and God. A couple who is living together for any reason, does not have the same values as this pastor. If he did marry them, he'd be sending the message that it's "ok"...when to him and his beliefs it's not. I would say get an officiant and let this one go.

PS- I am for equality. Anyone who loves each other should be able to get married-- But as a civil ceremony---not a religious one unless you adhere to the religious principles taught in the church.

Have you just asked the preacher if you can sleep in seperate rooms? I think it's a bit silly. I mean how many people on here lived with their parents and dated someone and had sex? The issue of where you live is kind of irrelevent. I think the issue is whether you have sex. One woman on here had to move back in with her parents and she and her FH have a child together. How hard must it be for the child to all of a sudden have to "lose" a parent for a while. It's almost like the parents got a divorce, I would think, from the kid's point of view. I know that they are probably having "joint custody" and moving the child back and forth, but that would have to be hard to understand for them.