FBIL Wife seems jealous of me and FH.

This is a long story but ill try to keep it short. Years ago my FH dated his now SIL when they were in highschool. When they broke up they kept seeing one another (you get what i mean). She then started dating my FH brother while still sleeping with him. He stopped it when he found out. He was pissed that his brother was dating her since they only broke up a month before and at first she said that he'd broken her heart and all. Anyway FH and his brother fell out for a couple years but are now close again. Well 5 months ago FH brother married this girl. I met his family the week of the wedding. I tried my hardest to be nice to this girl helped her with wedding plans and set up was understanding when she got all emotional and needed a female talk and everything. But lately their marriage hit a rocky path, she found that he'd been looking up hookers on craiglist and things. She was not faithful when he was in Iraq and complains constantly now about their life. cont

Posted On: Nov 3, 2009 at 3:18 PM | Vendors are allowed to participate


Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010

35 Comments | Login or Signup to post a comment!


Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:22 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
She started making comments about mine and FH relationship from the start. First she was jealous over the ring he got me then when me and him would be affectionat she'd comment that he'd never been that way with her with this sad look on her face which i dont think is something I need to know. Recently she demanded that she got my FH number from the brother and ring him to tell him the sex of the baby and called constantly on his birthday and I think that his brother should be doing that then she was texting him to see how he was and things. Now when im on facebook she never speaks to me but the other day I went into FH yahoo to check on emails from vendors and forgot chat was on and she started trying to talk to him I told her it was me and she said oh I was just bored and felt like talking but I had been on facebook for over an hour and so was she and she didnt say a word. It seems weird to me that she tells me about their marriage problems and then keeps wanting to contact my FH???

Laura K.
Community Megastar

Married: 05/15/2009
Reviews: 7
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:25 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
wow, she sounds like a total mess. I think you should be happy that she's not trying to talk with you anymore! Who needs that kinda drama in their life? It's a real shame but you and your FH probably should be distancing yourself from this situation. Be there for the BROTHER when he needs it, because sounds like he really will be needing it!, But don't have anything to do with her unless you have to.

The Potters
Community Superstar

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:28 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
WOW BE CAREFUL!!!!!!! Geez I really hate girls. You know what I mean? Girls can be so freaking awful. UGH!! I would tell your fiance to stop talking to her. You never know, she might get to him and he could do something wrong. Or something you see as wrong that he doesn't. She is obviously out to get you and probably wants to ruin your relationship. Her relationship is not a good one and she is jealous and wants what you have. I know she is family. But I'd tell you FH to stop talking to her unless necessary at a family function or something. This could turn even more ugly real quick.

arlala555
Community Superstar

Wedding: 05/15/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:28 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I think he did break her heart. She got mad and tried to get back at him by getting with his brother. I think as long as your FH is single she thinks she has the upper hand. But, with him getting married there's something he is making permanent. She is now slowly trying to contact him and see if there's any feelings left so maybe she can wiggle herself back into his life? It's like this some women don't give other guys a glance but when they are married they are like hey if that lovely women is giving him a chance then there might be something great about him after all. This is just what I think.

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:29 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Its so ridiculous. She has never had a job or anything and has no plans on a career or getting a degree and tries to talk to me like she knows so much about life because she's going to be a mom soon. She smokes while pregnant says she cant work or clean much because she's pregnant and things and when she found out me and FH are planning to try soon she tried to tell me to wait. Right now I really dont want her at our wedding if FBIL cant come (may be deployed) since she will have a 3 month old baby with her and FH and I really dont like her.

sweet_firefly
Community Superstar

Married: 11/14/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:30 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
It sounds like she's jealous of the relationship you and your FI have (obviously). I'd also be a little wary. It sounds to me like she would love to have more attention from your FI. I agree with Laura. I'd only deal with her when I had to.

CelticChick831
Community Megastar

Married: 10/17/2009
Reviews: 7
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:30 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Some girls just cant except when they have lost. My husbands first girlfriend has always been a part of his life and a friend of his and it has never bothered me, but when we got more serious, she wanted to talk to him about how they use to be. When it was obvious we were not going to break up (like been together 3 years ) she would always ask "so, you still with alanna?" and had only been 3 weeks since the last time she asked. When we got engaged, she commented a lot on how much she wished they could have worked things out and how much she missed him at times. Now, I kinda feel bad for her because she kinda fell into that bad boy croud and is now a single mom of 2 but she is doing a wonderful job with her kids and loves them to death and I can see why she looks back on things. Now that the wedding is over, she hasnt really contacted him much. Maybe she is jealous, but it might calm down once the wedding is over.

The Potters
Community Superstar

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:31 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Yeah, girls can be so vicious. I would stay away from her as much as possible. Seriously, I'd change your e-mail and FH's e-mail/phone numbers. Or block her from being able to contact you. I've sort of been there with a crazy ex gf of my husband. She was nuts. Tried her best to break us up. She was also kind of a loser and jealous of me.

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:33 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
@The Potters im definately not worried about the possibility of him getting with her. She is very closed minded has no ambitions and not to be rude here but she is about 3 sizes bigger than me. Everytime she rings FH either doesnt answer or quickly says he has to go. It drives him mad her doing this. She just keeps trying to contact him. He knew I went out of my way to be nice to her and says he actually feels sorry for his brother being stuck with her now since he seems miserable. It just annoys me that she doesnt get the hint or even thinks she can come between us.

The Potters
Community Superstar

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:36 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
That is good to hear. Make sure he knows to always be honest with you. Tell him you want to know every time she calls/texts/emails/IMs. That way you won't feel like he ever hides something from you. You may also want to sit down with her and FH and have a serious talk. Tell her tha you two are in love, obviously, and getting married and nothing will ever come between you. And you just want her to know that you feel she is trying to and you don't appreciate it.

yadayada
Community Superstar

Married: 10/30/2009
Reviews: 5
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:36 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Wow, D-R-A-M-A!!! I'm usually all about trying to make peace with family, but I would totally be wanting her out of my life!! Is this the same one who had like a tornado wreck the church right before her wedding or something?

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:41 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
@ Potters, oh yer FH is very honest about it lol. Even when we have been in seperate countries he rings me and tells me how she keeps calling him and he doesnt know what she wants and its pissing him off. It sort of seems like when he got back from his deployment with me she saw what she had missed. I think she thought she was so great because she got with his older brother and things but when me and FH got back we were so affectionate and he looked very different to when he left and we had plans to save and buy a home and things and she really has had no plans or anything and his brother is not romantic. I think the comments of he never did that for me were completely inappropriate though I know from everyone that my FH was never romantic or affectionate until he met me and I love that. @ Yada yep this is the same girl. I just dont know how to get her out of our lives without his family thinking we are being unfair and things. He's tried to be polite for his brother

The Potters
Community Superstar

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:48 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Does his brother love her? It doesn't seem like it since their has been cheating. But they are having a baby together. Are they for sure it is his baby? It is a hard situation. But you have a strong relationship and will get through it. She is being total inapropriate. She needs to be told to stop. Don't be nice, tell her like it is.

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 3:54 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I honestly dont know if he does. I think it was more that they were together a few years and then started trying for a baby then got engaged and once she was pregnant it seemed like no other option to him. When he asked her to marry him she just said its about time. I have no idea if he has cheated just know he has looked up hookers but we know for a fact she cheated throughout the relationship. When she got engaged people said who to? after years of dating. She is so young and immature. Granted I am young as well but both me and FH grew up quickly due to certain situations and work hard for what we want. She was married before she graduated high school and has done nothing but complain about everything.

The Potters
Community Superstar

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:00 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Sounds like she is immature and has nothing going for her in life. So she is jealous. Again, I'd just have a serious talk with her. Try to avoid her. But other than that there isn't too much you can do since she is family.

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:04 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Im thinking of trying to not invite her to the wedding if FBIL is on deployment. I asked before if they planned on bringing the new bub and she said yer of course and his parents will be there so they can look after her for a while. I just feel like its our special day and if his brother isnt there id rather she didnt come just to get attention and things. Plus the wedding is a six hour drive away and with only a 3 month old that seems a bit stupid especially when she is talking about drinking at the reception.

Bayridgeqt
Community Superstar

Wedding: 07/02/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:44 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Wow Aussie she sounds like a train wreck waiting to happen. I would stay as far away from that girl as humanly possible. You don't need someone like her in your life, especially not now. Good luck with her though, she sounds like a real handful.

Mrs. Sarah Halliwell
Community Megastar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 10
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:44 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
She sounds like apure scatterbrain...I'm sorry you have to go through thi! honestly weddings bring out the worst in some people!! i agree with the many women on here, dont talk to her, try to avoid her and just tell er its not apprecisted. your fh is obviously getting mad and i'm glad to hear he is tellin gyou about how annoying she is, shows great trust and communication. 6 hours with a 3 month old and plans to be drinking...ok i dont have any kids but that sounds insane...

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:49 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I am really hoping she doesnt come although she seems determined to. This whole jealousy thing happened the second we got engaged. 2 days after we announced our engagement and before everyone even knew since we were overseas she told his whole family she was pregnant even though she wasnt 6 weeks yet. It feels like all the focus must be on her and I really dont need our wedding being turned into her showing off the baby and drinking so everyone else has to look after them.

The Potters
Community Superstar

Married: 09/12/2009
Reviews: 8
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:52 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I bet she'll try to be the center of attention. Hopefully she doesn't do anything stupid to really embarass you....like yell something during the ceremony! And hopefully she isn't breast feeding and drinking.

yadayada
Community Superstar

Married: 10/30/2009
Reviews: 5
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 4:56 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
How do his parents feel about her?

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:03 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Its really hard to tell. She upsets his mum because her mother doesnt like his mother and if she's around her own mum she acts like she hates her too but then when its just her and his mum she acts like she really likes them. I think they really hope that it will work out between them but they also know she has no goals or anything in life and they found it really weird that less than 3 months after they got married she came back home to her mum for a few weeks and didnt bother to wait two days longer to be with her husband on his birthday before leaving for home so he spent it all alone. @ The potters I really hope she isnt either though she has smoked the whole time she's pregnant and at about 6 months pregnant went out dirt biking with no helmet and fell which her husband was furious that she even went on a bike.

Kari95630
Community Superstar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 1
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:09 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
Aussie, that girl sounds awful!! And that's really sad that she's endangering the life of her unborn child! I'd tell your FH to withdrawl from her as much as he can-- there's no need for her to be contacting him!

Mrs. Sarah Halliwell
Community Megastar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 10
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:12 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
ok nowshe definitely sounds lie a nut~!! who goes dirt biking at 6 months when they probably dont do it normally and without a helmet/ is she nuts?? and ya breast feeding and drinking isnt a good combo...

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:18 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
the whole thing is insane. My poor FH got a new number when we moved and things and she demanded it off her husband so she could call him with the news about the baby. There is just no need for that. He thinks she is insane he even jokes that he's going to buy his brother a straight jacket for xmas to keep her in. As for going dirt biking at six months and smoking I couldnt believe it. She has endometriosis and PCOS and said she had to get pregnant young and everything and then goes and risks her childs life???

Laura K.
Community Megastar

Married: 05/15/2009
Reviews: 7
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:21 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
She's a fruit loop and I'm so sorry for your FBIL and his child

Kari95630
Community Superstar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 1
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:26 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I'd say change your number...again.... ;)

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:29 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I am thinking maybe if we change his number and also get a joint facebook that she can add us on so it doesnt look like we are being nasty and delete her from our personal ones? I do not want her causing anymore drama if we delete her and things but if we have a joint account for family and a joint email then she wont be able to contact just him>? What do you ladies think.

Kari95630
Community Superstar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 1
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:36 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
I think that's a good idea. Maybe it will further deter her from contacting you guys period. Couldn't hurt to try it!

Mrs. Sarah Halliwell
Community Megastar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 10
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 5:43 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
i agree with Kari. Why not try it. t may deter the but from trying to contact him knowing you will be able to seee what shes sending. haha like laura said shes a fruitloop. PS Love it! havent heard that one in a while!!

Leeann
Community Superstar

Wedding: 11/11/2011
Posted On: Nov 03, 2009 at 11:11 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
ROFL I have PCOS and my doctor said that people with pcos have a hard time to get pregnant on there own but there is fertility etc and drs can't say for sure she couldnt get pregnant later on in life I went on thinking the same thing omg we need to try and try now but then I spoke with doctors who said I can't tell the future etc, she sounds like a frigen nut bar id tell her to go play hide and go seek with herself and take a hike, wow shes a frigenjob and a half.I hate it when people with pcos make it out to be like that she has no idea smoking and doing stupid stuff I have been threw so much with this disease that its not even funny she really needs to grow up big time!

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 4:47 AM | Flag As Inappropriate
Leeann, I completely agree. FH and I both know there is a chance we cant have kids and discussed it. I suffer very badly with endometriosis and due to the consequences of other surgeries we arent sure how a pregnancy will be for me however we both knew we wouldnt start trying till after we were married, financially stable and ready for a child. To start trying before they were even engaged, before she left school and before they were financially stable or even had their own apartment seems ridiculous to me and she has used it as a constant excuse as to why she cant work or do anything. If she really wanted a healthy child she wouldnt be smoking and things and I believe she has had at least a few drinks.

november bride
Community Superstar

Married: 11/20/2009
Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 11:49 AM | Flag As Inappropriate
It sounds like she is somewhat deranged and I wouldn't be surprised if she is trying to miscarry the baby to seek out your FH's sympathies in hopes of getting him back. Maybe you and FH can talk to his brother and tell him how inappropriate she is being. Also, tell him that you need to detach from the drama that she is trying to create and that you would love to have him at the wedding if he weren't being deployed but that his wife is absolutely not invited; it is your and FH's day and that you don't want her to pull any surprises. That neither you or FH is going to feed her drama and that she should focus on the wellbeing of their unborn child. Maybe he could talk to her or suggest that she seek therapy. She is a bully and a manipulator and doesn't deserve the satisfaction of upsetting you. Sorry for the rough tone, I just don't like to see the anxiety that she is causing for you and FH.

analy m.
Community Superstar

Married: 10/03/2009
Reviews: 5
Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 12:02 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
The problem that I see here is this: this woman seems to enjoy the thrill of the chase, and thrives on drama. If she has broken up marriages before, there is NO reason that she would not try it again. Some women just like to pursue what they cannot have, for the challenge. My husband has a saying, "no woman wants what no other woman wants". In other words, men that are married, or "tried and true" are more attractive. We have seen examples of that since the day he put his ring on....unfortunately, but I trust him 100%. There will always be those women, it just SUCKS that its your FSIL. Just be cautious, and be frank and open with all parties, including FBIL. I agree about changing the number, and FH should put his foot down and tell her NOT to call, or to call YOU instead. Good luck!!

Aussie Bride
Community Megastar

Wedding: 02/07/2010
Posted On: Nov 04, 2009 at 4:09 PM | Flag As Inappropriate
We have really wanted to not discuss it with his brother as their marriage is under so much strain already. However I am going to create joint emails and facebook accounts for us and delete her from the personal ones. If she continues though we will have no choice but to tell her enough and speak to her husband as well.
Login or Signup to post a comment!