Dollar Dance...Tip Jar?? I'm so confused...
We had a meeting with our DJ and he was pushing the Dollar Dance for our wedding. Personally I do not want to do it because
1. I feel bad chargind a $1 for a dance with me (lets admit it I'm a dancing machine anyways and I'm going to be out on the dance floor all night)
2. Most of our guests consists of newly graduated college kids who are there for the party

So I finally got through to my DJ and he agreed but also offered up the alternative to put a "Tip Jar" next to our signature drink to make it look like the tips are going to the bartenders. We have already tipped our bartender 25% in our contract and it states that they are not allowed to take any more tips from the guests from our wedding.

Now I feel like we would be deceaving our guests making them think the tips are going to the bartenders when in fact it's for us. I'm wondering how I can word a "tip jar" to let guests know the money will be spent on our honeymoon/house. Any ideas??

Married: 09/17/2011
Posted On: Feb 25, 2011 at 9:22 AM • Vendors are allowed • Add to My WatchlistFlag As Inappropriate1 like

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Married: 10/09/2011
Reviews: 11
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:23 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Sorry but I don't like the idea of guest tipping you for anything. Thats just me, it seems a little tacky and you can always tell your DJ no and if hes a professional he should then drop the topic.

Married: 05/14/2011
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:26 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I agree with Stacy. Your guests will bring you a gift (whether money or an item) so you don't need to beg for more $ on top of that.

Married: 10/01/2011
Reviews: 18
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:26 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
SS....Yikes, the DJ does have bad manners. You are right. Your guests are already incuring the expense to come to your wedding: outfit, transportation and gift. Asking for any other money is rude, imho. But then again, I am very anti Dollar Dance, and it is not part of my culture. If it is part of your culture, than only you can make the decision.

Re tip jars for the signature drink, you are also right. You have tipped the bartenders and you would be deceiving the guests. Rude! I am surprised he didn't suggest a tip jar for himself. : )

Married: 07/30/2011
Reviews: 6
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:28 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Amen, Stacy G!
If you wanted to make a "house fund" container, and put it on the gift table, to collect envelopes, etc. that might be okay. Tip jars (when you have already tipped the bartenders) and $$ dances leave a bad taste in my mouth.

Married: 06/04/2011
Reviews: 6
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:31 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Holy crap. I agree with the other girls, just...no...

Married: 09/17/2011
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:32 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
They DJ even suggested to just put a mason jar next to our signature drink with a dollar in it and the rest of the people will follow when I brought up my concerns about the tacky "tip jar". He told me a lot of people do it labeling it as "Getaway cash" if it was me I would want to know what my money is going towards instead of dropping it in some container.

Thanks for the advice ladies

Married: 10/01/2011
Reviews: 18
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:34 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
"Get away cash"...yikes.

Lmao @ Rosie's, "Holy Crap."

Married: 10/09/2011
Reviews: 11
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:37 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
SS. I still think the fact that your DJ suggested this is beyond tacky and so unprofessional of it.

I understand some people like a money dance and to each their own, however having a tip jar for you at your wedding is just as tacky and I think a big no no.

Again thats just my opinion, even if you label it as getaway cash. People who want to bring gifts and give you money will. They shouldn't have to be reminded each time they go get a drink.

Just leave a cardholder at your gift table for those who want to give you cash. Avoid a tip jar for yourself.

And figure out what the heck is with your DJ. YUCK.

Edited On: Feb 25, 2011 at 9:38 AM

Married: 05/14/2011
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:43 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Yeah, it is your wedding and if you are not comfortable with just tell him, "Thanks for the ideas, but FS and I have decided we do not want to do that." If he pushes it any further say, "There is nothing further to discuss. We considered the suggestion and decided NOT to do it. End of story."


And yes, weddings are extremely expensive for the bride & groom (or whoever is paying) but they are also very expensive for guests. People seem to forget the second part. There is no need to try to hit them up for even more money. You also put people on the spot more that way. By giving a gift, people can give what they are comfortable with. By essentially asking someone for $ in front of tons of other people, you can make them very uncomfortable and feel bad if they don't have it.
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:47 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
That is not only tacky, but totally unprofessional to offer something like that.

Several cultures - Eastern European in particular - have a money dance because it is believe to be good luck for the couple, so let's just give him the benefit of the doubt, so that you can put any fears aside, and just enjoy your wedding.

Good luck,
Gaby

JJ
Married: 10/01/2011
Feb 25, 2011 at 9:58 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I can't believe your DJ is being so pushy on the subject! It almost sounds like he thinks that if you get more cash on-hand at your wedding, he'll get a bigger tip....

Patricia
Married: 06/26/2011
Reviews: 9
Feb 25, 2011 at 10:03 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I don't like how pushy your DJ is. It's your wedding, not his! Dollar dances are tacky and would offend some guests, so I'm glad you're not doing it, especially since you don't want to.

The tip jar is inappropriate, as well, especially since you are tipping the bartenders as a gracious host, for your guests. Don't do it! In fact, you could go as far as to put up a sign saying "gratuities have been taken care of your host" so that people don't tip again.

Married: 09/17/2011
Feb 25, 2011 at 10:06 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
We have already tipped him 18% under his contract . He is getting no more cash from us.

We made sure to tip the bartenders extra because they were not getting paid much $200 for the night includes the cups napkins and bar set up and I think they have the hardest job at the wedding!

I'm totally anti dollar dance as well. I'll have to get with my day of coordinator to let her know to watch out for the funny business.

Michelle
Married: 09/03/2011
Reviews: 5
Feb 25, 2011 at 10:17 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
personally, I don't like asking for money, I don't even like being the centre of attention, so I'm having issues with showers and parties and whatnot. However, Hubby is Greek/Dutch, so people come throwing money, there's no way around it. If you have a family like that, then putting a 'card box' out is ok... but I don't (personally) think it's ok to be putting out 'tip jars'.. this guy sounds very unprofessional... I hope you get the message across and he drops it. I also really hope that you don't have any other issues with this guy!
Feb 25, 2011 at 10:46 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
First, any DJ that pushes anything on you for your wedding is not professional. It's your wedding, do what you want to do. If he is pushing the dollar dance, it sounds like he worried about getting people on the dance floor. Red flag. I'm not a fan of dollar dances, but if you like the concept of sharing a dance with all of your guests, just call it a friendship dance. Your guests will recognize it to be the same and will give you money without having to mention money. A tip jar at a wedding is really tacky.

Married: 11/05/2011
Feb 25, 2011 at 11:21 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
@theweddingcentral: I'm marrying a Croatian man and it is a tradition there for one dance to have the maid of honor hold a basket, and men will put money into it to have the right to dance with the bride. The more money they give, the longer they can dance. Even though his parents are a little sad that we won't be doing it, we both decided not to. We're incorporating lots of other Croatian traditions into the wedding but, not this one.

Married: 10/07/2011
Reviews: 5
Feb 25, 2011 at 11:23 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Noooooo, do not do this. Very deceiving...use a honeymoon or money registry site if you need cash for those type of things. We used the honeymoon registry at couples resort, since that is where we are going. CHeck into mywishingwell.com or similar money sites.

Mrs. Roberts
Married: 06/04/2011
Reviews: 5
Feb 25, 2011 at 12:33 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
PMEDJ hit the nail on the head! I like the idea of a friendship dance to get everyone out on the floor without them having to pay!

Married: 02/19/2011
Reviews: 8
Feb 25, 2011 at 2:36 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Why's he pushing the dollar dance so much?? Thats weird...we had a dollar dance but that's b/c its tradition in our families & friends so nothing out of the ordinary & we told the dj, but not once was it his idea. And the whole tipping jar, strange too. It's like he's looking for ways for ya to get extra money but if ur not into it, then just dont do it. We loved the dollar dance b/c it gave us the opportunity to actually dance w/ our guests and also greet them. It really isn't about the $$, but it's fun too :)

That one chick who's married to that one dude
Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 5
Feb 25, 2011 at 3:20 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
It should be up to you if you want to do the dollar dance or not. I wouldn't do a tip jar or anything. If he continues to do it, then maybe you should find a new DJ.
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