Bridal Shower Timing (in proximity to wedding)
Hi ladies :) My Mom and FMIL are throwing me a shower. The problem is that my parents will be traveling to Florida (from Michigan) during the months of February, March and part of April (they are snowbirds). My wedding is May 19, 2012. Our choice for the shower date are either Late January (Jan. 22) or mid-April (Apr. 8 or 15). January is 4 months before the wedding and April is only 4 weeks before the wedding. My Mom and I think January is fine, a bit early, but still OK. FMIL is worried about a snow storm in January (a slim to none chance), but is still OK with January. I would prefer to have it in January because it allows my mother and I plenty of time after the shower to focus on the wedding. Also, I need to fit in my Bachelorette party sometime in April (after my Mom gets home). In Michigan, anywhere from 1-3 months before the wedding is normal timing for a bridal shower. So, the question becomes, is 4 months before the wedding too early to throw a shower?

Married: 05/19/2012
Reviews: 5
Posted On: Aug 5, 2011 at 9:48 AM • Vendors are allowed • Add to My WatchlistFlag As Inappropriate1 like

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Married: 09/17/2011
Reviews: 6
Aug 05, 2011 at 9:49 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Ours is 6 weeks before the wedding (this weekend). I don't think there's any rule, and I'd do what works best for you.

Married: 2+ years ago
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 9:52 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
pp i agree with! Who cares if it is 4 or 6 or ewhatever weeks ... I say if you can have it then have it then. =]

Married: 05/19/2012
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 10:22 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Thanks in advance for any opinions :)

Married: 09/10/2011
Reviews: 7
Aug 05, 2011 at 10:35 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Mine was in early June and I'm getting married in September. Part of the reason they threw it for me then is because one of my BM's is expecting and is actually due anytime so they didn't want her traveling too late in her pregnancy. I am so glad they had it early. It gave me time to write out thank you notes, sort through gifts and just take my time with it. If it was only 4-6 weeks before my wedding I think I would have been stressed. But again, it's what works for you and your family. I just know I enjoyed it being 4 months before my wedding.

Married: 06/02/2012
Aug 05, 2011 at 10:39 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I'm planning on doing mine closer to the wedding vs farther away. I want to do the bridal shower after the invites for the wedding have gone out so that the people attending the bridal shower know they are invited to the wedding. I'd just ask yourself if you'd feel weird going to a bridal shower for someone else 4 months before their wedding, if you wouldn't then I say it's probably okay.

Married: 05/19/2012
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 10:48 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I think its a little strange, but it is a strange circumstance. People know I'm strange anyways... ;) I think that it is an unspoken rule that if you are invited to the shower, you MUST be invited to the wedding. It would be very rude not to invite them to the wedding...

Any other opinions...?

Married: 05/19/2012
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 11:25 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Brandie - did anyone give you grief about having it too early? Just curious...

Married: 08/20/2011
Reviews: 3
Aug 05, 2011 at 11:33 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Ettiquette states within 3 months of the wedding. I don't think 4 weeks before the wedding will be a big deal if you're on schedule with your planning.

Another issue with January- it's right after Christmas. People will still be financially recovering, so it will be more difficult on them to get you gifts, etc.

I think a shower 4 weeks prior to the wedding is perfect! Your registry will be up to date as well instead of having to update it at least twice between the shower and the wedding.

Married: 05/19/2012
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 11:54 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
I would prefer not to have it in April. I would like that time to focus on the wedding (and more importantly, let my mom enjoy the wedding planning and not have to worry about the shower). What etiquette book are you reading that states "within 3 months" of the wedding? Everything I've seen only requires at least 2 weeks before the ceremony... Is 4 months before that egregious of an etiquette violation?

Married: 05/19/2012
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 12:05 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
When to Have the Bridal Shower

The shower should take place anywhere from 6 months before to the week of the wedding. If many guests are traveling from out of town, it may make sense to have it close to the wedding, so they can attend. Otherwise, it can be nice to have it four months or more before the wedding, so that it will add to anticipation, without adding to a bride's last minute stress. (Some etiquette guides say to wait until after the wedding invitations have gone out, but I think it's fine to do it earlier, as long as all shower invitees will definitely be invited to the wedding itself.) As for time of day, the traditional time is Sunday afternoon, but really any time day or night is fine.


They say up to 6 months is fine.

Married: 08/27/2011
Reviews: 5
Aug 05, 2011 at 1:53 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
mines was last weekend and i'm getting married the end of this month. your date options look good to me, maybe april will be good.


Cakes By Christina
Aug 05, 2011 at 1:56 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
We had ours 4 weeks before the wedding. I didn't have anything to do with the planning, so there was no stress involved on my end. I thought 4 weeks was nice because I had time to unpack everything and put it all away before the wedding gifts rolled in.

Married: 10/29/2011
Aug 05, 2011 at 2:01 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I guess you already decided then..But if you did do it in April you could always have the bachlorette party and shower in same weekend..would make it easier if any of your BMs were traveling.

Married: 10/01/2011
Reviews: 1
Aug 05, 2011 at 4:27 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
ours is 6 weeks before

Married: 01/19/2013
Reviews: 1
Jan 29, 2012 at 1:28 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I'm actually having a similar dilemma, my wedding is in January, 5 months after my bridal shower in August but it was as close as I could get it without excluding family members who have to travel to be there, and then travel again to be at the wedding. So I say, if it works it works! Your wedding and wedding preparation should be a time to enjoy all the moments, and if having your shower earlier than some would expect means you get a better experience, that's what it's all about. :) and Congrats!!!
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