Dudes’ Help

Posted by freesia on Feb 22, 2011

I have heard of various ranges of groom-to-be’s helping out with their wedding planning. I think most common is a compliant from bride-to-be’s that they want nothing to do with it. On the same note, I’ve heard gentlemen say they could care less about what color the napkins are or how the aisle is decorated. It was from this group, I believe, that Freesia Dude heard that wedding planning was one of the most difficult things a couple’s relationship has gone through. So before we had even started, he was a bit on edge. I found the following article on “The Knot.com” that he actually found assuring…

theknot.com on Engagement Issues and How to Avoid Them

However, Freesia Dude saw me stressing out a bit in the very beginning while we were trying to decide on a location and venue. We both realized early on that I was going his help and support. With that said, as we began to make decisions it became more clear that this would be a lesson in compromise. There is something to be said for having two opinions on a decision instead of one. When those opinions differ, a compromise must be made.

So, they say to the bride, this is your big day, he needs to do what you want! But, says the bride, sometimes I need help figuring that out!

It seems I look for more opinion from my Dude than most brides, as I have gotten somewhat surprised looks more than once when I looked to Freesia Dude for his opinion. It also appears to me that Freesia Dude might care a bit more than most grooms. The best part is, that Freesia Bud and Freesia Dude know each other better than anyone else and, though our compromises are rarely perfect and not always super easy, we work together to make decisions we are both happy with. In the early planning stages, it seemed that I needed more help and Freesia Dude had more input. Now that the planning is rolling, I have it more under control and Freesia Dude has said his piece and we are, more often than not, on the same page. There were times when I wanted him to relinquish to my wants more, and eventually he did. Now, he has handed me the reigns because he knows that I will care for the things he wants and I know that he is there to support me whenever I need it.

Whether your groom is planning your wedding, or is simply showing up on the Big Day, let your Dude be your support. I hope that this time of growing together during your engagement is one of happiness and preparation to make two lives one…be that learning to compromise, trust, and support one another.