Bridal Party Woes

Posted by morningglory on Jul 05, 2012

So, call me over-involved but I’m always keeping up with my bridesmaids about my bridal shower, bachelorette party and other wedding related events. I don’t want anything to be a surprise first of all (lol) and second, I’ve been in two weddings myself where things have happened two different ways. One bad, and one was pretty good, so all I want is to make sure everything goes smoothly and everyone is staying involved.

I was in my cousin’s wedding and the maid of honor did next to nothing while the rest of us planned everything, and then I was left to be the hostess and speak at the shower and bachelorette party because no one else felt comfortable talking in front of people (grumbles). The other one, the maid of honor made decisions and pretty much did everything herself (as far as I know) so I literally just felt like a wedding guest and not a bridesmaid.

With that being said, I really just wanted everyone in my bridal party to be involved. I knew it was more of a fantasy, but now I’m having “regrets” (is there a not-so-ugly word I can use instead?) about who I chose to be in my bridal party. My experiences with the weddings I’ve been in and talking to other brides is that everyone has that “one bridesmaid” who doesn’t do anything, complains about how much things cost or is never available to get together with the other bridesmaids to plan things. The reality of it is that I’m just not as close with this bridesmaid as I used to be. I barely see her maybe once every three months and while I know I shouldn’t have asked her to be a bridesmaid to begin with, I felt guilty and did anyway. I hate hearing my bridesmaids complain about her, but there isn’t much I can do because I know they are right. To be honest if she wasn’t a bridesmaid, she probably wouldn’t even be on the guest list either.

With that being said, has anyone had “that bridesmaid” that you grew apart from during the wedding planning process? Or the one that your bridesmaids all complain about? If so, how did/do you deal?